15 People Who Trap Others in Toxic Friendships

Some friendships don’t feel like friendships at all—they drain you, confuse you, and leave you wondering how you got tangled in someone else’s chaos. These true stories expose the subtle tricks and quiet manipulations that turn “besties” into energy thieves, revealing how toxic bonds tighten before you even notice the trap.

• I had a good friend for 15+ years. My wife and I let him live in our finished basement for months, rent-free, after he was kicked out from his father’s house (as an adult, having moved back in due to lack of funds). He stayed for 90 days longer than we had originally set out in the agreement, and was messier than we liked.
  The final straw was that he spilled something on the carpet and didn’t clean it up. My wife texted him and asked him to clean it up, several times over a week. Finally, she gave him a deadline to get it done. He got irate, started calling her names and insulting her.
  That was the last straw. I texted him once — to let him know everything he owned was now sitting at the curb beside the garbage bin. He could pick it up, or the garbage men, whoever got there first. I didn’t really care, but neither him nor anything he owned was welcome in my house anymore. © ACBluto / Reddit

• After talking to a guy I liked, we found out my “best friend” was telling both of us that the other person didn’t like us/found us annoying. He would ask her to invite me to parties, and she’d tell him I couldn’t come, or that I said no and that he annoyed me. She’d tell me that he didn’t invite me because he thought I was annoying. All because she liked him but wouldn’t admit it to anyone.
  When we finally realized, we got together and stopped being friends with her. We’ve been together for 11 years now! © horton_hears_a_homie / Reddit

• My best friend of 10 years and her husband had a falling out with my brother because my brother chose to stay out of a situation they were having with someone else, another mutual friend of ours. He didn’t wanna get involved.
  I agreed he shouldn’t get involved. They got so nasty and bitter about it all over time, and ended up lying to my brother’s new wife and told her he cheated on her with one of our other friends. I knew this not to be true at all.
  They continued to make up stories and lie to her about him, and it eventually destroyed their marriage because it created mistrust and conflict. His wife already had a lot of mental health struggles, and it made it worse for her. They eventually divorced.
  I cut them out of my life. Since then, they have apologized and admitted to making up all the stories out of hurt and bitterness that my brother wouldn’t take their side in the conflict they were having with someone else, but it is all just too late. My brother’s marriage was destroyed and so was our friendship. No coming back from that.
  By the way, my brother didn’t get involved because they were the ones in the wrong and if he told them that, imagine how much worse their revenge would be! They’re unhinged. And their own marriage has since fallen apart. Karma. © NachosandM*******s / Reddit

• Found out one of my bridesmaids had a fling with my husband the night before our wedding. Sadly, we were married 12 years before I found out. Bye bye husband, bye bye friend. © foxylady315 / Reddit

• My best friend and I got into a car crash while I was driving. She never blamed me.
  Months later, she offered to plan my birthday party. I happily said yes. But then I saw a message popped up on her phone. My blood boiled as I read it: “She’s a fool! Now she will pay for letting you through that nasty car crash. Your plan to humiliate her in front of everyone is perfect.”
  It was a text from one of our friends. I couldn’t believe what they were saying behind my back.
  Turns out, my best friend never got over the car crash. I confronted her right away and cut contact with her and the others who sided with her. I’d rather have one real friend than 10 toxic ones.

• Just got to the point where my friend (few years younger than me, I was 40 at the time, he’d have been 35) was stupidly one-sided. The only time I really heard from him was when he was in need, we’d meet up, and I was basically his therapist, and he constantly forgot his wallet to boot. The second he got into a relationship with a girl, he’d disappear completely, only to pop back up again a couple of months later when it inevitably went sideways.
  The actual breaking point came when I bumped into him after not seeing him for six months. He scolded me about not being there for him after his dog died a couple of months prior. I pointed out that I only found out about it on Facebook, that I immediately offered my condolences and left a voicemail saying to let me know if he needed anything.
  And then I just got pissed off and asked him where HE was four months prior when my then 2YO daughter was in the hospital having some serious surgery, or where HE was when MY own dog died, or in fact why it was that whenever we met up he rarely asked how I was doing.
  Haven’t seen him since, and no loss. Emotional parasite. © uber****/ Reddit

• My friend played horrible games when she felt jilted by a man. Fake pregnancies, fake miscarriages, and calling girlfriends of old lovers and telling them he’s cheating with her. (They weren’t.)
  She was perfectly willing to ruin a man over petty jealousies and something as simple as a normal breakup. Like, if he didn’t want to be with her anymore, she would do something evil. I tried to do some damage control with some of them by letting them know I had proof they didn’t cheat, or get her pregnant.
  This was before social media and barely out of the pager phase so it was hard to contact everyone I knew she was trying to ruin. Every time she did something like that or talked about doing it, I felt sick, and I just eventually ghosted her after years of close friendship. We had already begun to argue because I refused to go along with her tricks.
  I didn’t know she could do things like that until the last year or so, and it shocked and sickened me. That was over 20 years ago, and I still sometimes wonder how many people she’s ruined since I quit speaking to her. There’s gotta be some. © coffee-jnky / Reddit

• I had a friend who only wanted to talk when she had issues, and me being a good person would listen and offer advice (she never took it), she would never ask how I was or if I joined in talking about my problems she would put me on loudspeaker and go on FB.
  There’s more to it but would take too long to explain. She stopped speaking to me for months (did this when she started being friends with someone else) so I decided, enough was enough and stopped answering calls etc.
  6 months went by, and I got a note posted through my door saying she was “worried” about me and had “tried” to contact me! She had called twice and text me a few times. Basically showed up at my house with her mother and I had no choice but to speak to her since she was hammering on my door and window.
  I saw her a fair bit for about 2 months and then, suddenly, she just stopped calling and texting again. I haven’t seen her since February last year, and I’m happier for it. I’ve cut out people in my life who have treated me like a doormat and been toxic. Never been happier! © Unknown author / Reddit

• My friend was down for free dinners/treats, my clothes, and whatever she could get. I planned a nice birthday for her and when it came to my birthday she casually gave me a couple of used ugly expired lipsticks. When she did that, it made me realize that she made no effort for me when it was her turn to show me that she cared.
  When we both got into our own relationship at around the same time and hers didn’t work out, she started acting jealous/nasty towards me. This changed the relationship for the worse. I said my goodbye and cut her out of my life, and we now have no contact. It’s taken some time to get over it, but I’m accepting of it now, and my life is better with no drama from her. © Properdabber / Reddit

• Friends for over a decade. I was her maid of honor. She had 3 children with her husband, whom I was also very good friends with. I was very close with the kids, they called me auntie.
  I worked for her out of a home office. Watched the marriage deteriorate. She started a relationship with one of her clients after the marriage ended. She then started to treat her children like a burden.
  The new relationship was (and still is, to the best of my knowledge) more important than her children. When someone starts to severely neglect their children for a new, exciting date boy, I have to walk away. © redrainbow76 / Reddit

• I was in a car accident years back. Was for a long time at the hospital. Both my brothers told my best friend of over 20 years what happened.
  Not once did he reach out to see how I was or ask if I was ok or wished me well. I was hurt by it, but tried to make some sort of sense of it, like maybe he just didn’t know what to say, or he was shocked by the news, or he wanted to give me space to recover.
  Months later I’m home but still in crutches and can barely move without a great deal of pain. Reached out to my friend on the phone, talked a bit and asked if he felt like coming over to watch a movie, play some games and just hang out. I was lonely and missed him.
  He seemed enthused but asked if I could WALK to his house in December on icy roads barely able to hobble around on crutches to hang out there instead. He lived 0.2 miles from me and couldn’t drive or walk the roughly 5 minutes to my house. I stopped talking to him shortly after. © Unknown author / Reddit

• My coworker is also my good friend. After a talk with our boss, he suddenly started avoiding me. When I asked, he smiled and said, “Everything is OK.”
  But 2 days later, my heart sank when our boss’s secretary pulled me aside and said, “Didn’t you know why your friend was called into the boss’s office the other day?” I told her how could I know when he’s been avoiding me.
  Turns out, the boss called him in to talk about his poor performance and even compared him to me, saying he should be more like me or something. So I tried talking to him. He refused to let it go and even accused me of making him look bad. Since then, our friendship faded into just being coworkers.

• My best friend from university came back to visit his parents who live in the same city as me, and we wanted to have dinner. I knew he was super flaky in university, so I made sure I kept my week open because I knew he wouldn’t know when he was available until the last minute.
  I was so excited to introduce him to my fiancé and show him our new house. We got everything for a really nice dinner. The day before we had planned to have dinner, he texted me that he didn’t feel like driving over from his parents’ house (30 min) the next day because “he might be tired”.
  I was mad that he was flaking on such important plans, but I offered to bring all the stuff for dinner and drive out to him instead. He said, “No, thanks.” I realized that he really didn’t care about anything that was going on in my life and was still as immature as he had been in university. I decided it wasn’t a friendship I wanted to maintain anymore. © kitsk*** / Reddit

• My friend repeatedly screwed me over and always blamed it on their ADHD, without ever seeking help for the condition. When I attempted to work through things with them, they invalidated my concerns and spun it around to make me feel like I was attacking them because of their ADHD status. I ended that relationship months ago, and I am kicking myself for not ending it sooner. © Unknown author / Reddit

• My ex—best friend has three kids, and I used to babysit for her constantly: overnights, weekends, whenever she had work or a date. A couple of weeks ago, I was watching her kids again. We were playing a game when her 4-year-old suddenly looked up at me and said, “Auntie Lena, I saw Mom take your wallet. She told me not to tell you.”
  I froze. She’d never taken anything from me before, and she wasn’t struggling financially. Why my wallet? I checked: my cash, cards, ID, everything was still there.
  Later, I confronted her. She went pale, then blurted, “Fine. You’d find out anyway. I’m dating Mike.” Mike is my husband—soon to be ex.
  Still stunned, I asked what that had to do with my wallet. She didn’t even blink: “I took that photo of you and Mike. I wanted to scan it, photoshop you out, and put myself in.”
  At that point, I didn’t know what was more disgusting: stealing my husband or trying to erase me from my own family photo. I cut off both of them immediately. No contact since.

After years of infertility, Maja’s best friend finally became a mom, and Maja couldn’t be happier. She supported her, celebrated with her, even planned to be the baby’s godmother. But one shocking announcement at the baby shower turned Maja’s joy into the worst day of her life. Read her story here.