A Single Man Adopts a Girl Who Lived in a Hospital for a Year, and It Changed Both of Their Lives
The hero of our story is a single, gay man who dreamt of becoming a father in a country where the LGBTQ+ community was only taking the first steps in fighting for their rights. His way to a strong, loving family was complicated. He had to overcome all of the difficulties on his path to give a loving home to a little girl who was left alone, and build the family he’d been dreaming of.
Meet Pablo Fracchia, a man whose biggest dream was to become a father.
Pablo Fracchia is a social worker, Red Cross volunteer, and LGBTQ+ activist from Argentina. For his whole life, Fracchia dreamt of becoming a father. “But then, I found out I was gay, and growing up in the ’90s, thinking of a family as a gay man was something impossible in Argentina,” he shared. “Super cruel for a teenager who had to choose between being who he was and giving up one of his dreams.”
Later, Fracchia started working closely with the LGBTQ+ Federation of Argentina. They were striving to establish marriage equality. “After that, the long-lost idea of a family, but especially having a kid, slowly came back to my mind,” he said. In 2017, overcoming all the fears and uncertainties he had, after going through therapy and a rethinking process, Pablo decided to go for his dream.
“As I always say: ’When desire won over fear’ I decided to move forward and filled out the papers to start the adoption process,” he shared.
Meanwhile, Mia was living alone in a hospital, waiting for a loving home.
2 years later, in 2019, Fracchia finally got a chance. “A family judge called and said that there was a little girl that, by that time, was one year and 10 months old, and was living in a hospital,” recounted Pablo. “Mia had a gastrointestinal condition that needed care, and since her biological family was unable to provide it, the family court ordered that Mia be sent to a ‘foster home/hospital’ that the system has for kids with health issues.”
The adoption process was not smooth.
“In Argentina, the adoption process usually is not difficult, but it is extremely long,” said Fracchia. Besides that, in the province Pablo is from, “family judges are the ones that choose the parent and decide whether you can adopt the kid or not. So, in the end, it all comes down to whether you get a judge who is sensitive, open, and inclusive enough to think that a gay single man could be a good parent for a baby.”
Pablo was not the only candidate up for the adoption. “The court also had 4 other couples on the shortlist for evaluation,” he shared. “Imagine being single and gay. I thought I had very little chance to be chosen.” Luckily, the judge was objective enough to make a decision despite all the common prejudices.
“The next day, I traveled to the hospital to meet her (I had never seen Mia, not even on a photo),” he said.
It will be hard to forget the first time the 2 of them met.
After Pablo arrived at the hospital, the nurse brought him into a room where they were supposed to meet. “The door opened, and there she was, being held by a nurse,” Pablo recounted. “I was sitting, so the nurse approached and gave her to me. And we hugged, for a long time. Some long minutes later, she pointed to a toy and started to play with it. She kinda nodded to me to let me know she wanted me in. I joined the game. And there it was. We met.”
Pablo had to sacrifice one of the most important businesses of his life to become a father.
After Mia came into his life, Pablo had to leave his non-profit activities. He stopped working as a Red Cross volunteer and left the humanitarian missions, as they required him to be away from home for a long time. “Being a Red Cross volunteer was an essential part of me,” Pablo said. “I have spent more years of my life as a volunteer than outside the Red Cross. Its’ values and principles formed me as a man.”
“The idea of leaving the organization was extremely hard but worth it. And I would do it again,” Pablo recounted.
Have you ever thought of adopting a child? Did Pablo and Mia’s story inspire you to go for the adoption?