I Asked AI to Control My Life, Here’s What Happened

Bzzzz! The alarm went off. Today is the day — I let the AI control every single thing I do — but for one day only. Let’s see if the bot can help me survive through this day, shall we?

I grab my laptop, open ChatGPT, and type in the most important question any Homo Sapiens can ask the AI in the morning. “What should I have for breakfast?”

The chatbot says: “Good morning! How about some scrambled eggs with toast and avocado on the side? Or if you’re in the mood for something sweet, you could make some pancakes or waffles with fresh fruit and syrup. Another option could be a breakfast burrito with scrambled eggs, cheese, and your choice of meat or veggies. Hope that helps!”

Huh, this artificial dude talking to me is pretty sweet. And the menu he suggested is pretty good. Still, I grab my usual cup of coffee and ignore the chatbot’s piece of advice. I mean, who’s got time to cook all those delicacies in the morning? I brushed my teeth, took a shower, and now I gotta choose something to wear. Chatbot, need your help! What should I wear today?

“That depends on what your plans are for the day and the weather. If it’s hot outside, you might want to wear something light and breathable like shorts and a t-shirt. If it’s cooler, you could go for jeans and a sweater. If you have any specific events or activities planned, you may want to dress accordingly. Ultimately, wear whatever makes you feel comfortable and confident!”

Yeah, that makes sense and stuff, but it’s not that informative. Right. By the way, the weather’s awesome today, and I don’t really feel like working today. Hey, maybe I should skip work today? What do you think, Mr. GPT?

“As an AI language model, I don’t have access to your work schedule or responsibilities. It’s best to check with your employer or supervisor to see if you need to go to work today.”

Nah, that’s boring. You know what — chatbot is just like my mom, she always says the very same thing, except she’s not an AI language model. Okay, chatbot, maybe you can at least invent a decent lie to tell my boss?

“I’m sorry, but as an AI language model, I cannot assist you in inventing a lie to tell your boss. It’s important to be honest with your employer and communicate any changes in your availability or schedule as soon as possible. If you need to take a day off, it’s best to be upfront and provide a valid reason for you.”

Nah, this chatbot is like those boring kids at school. Whatever. Yeah, GPT is a cool thing if you have some ACTUAL, not a rhetorical question. It can give you a nice recipe, help with homework or even your work project.

But once you start talking to the chatbot as if it were a real person, it says: “as an AI language model”... and all the fun fades away. Yeah, I definitely didn’t expect it to be... boring?