I Refuse to Forgive My Parents for Taking Away the Life I Deserved

Parenting is hard work, but most parents have the same goal: to raise hardworking, humble children. Some even go as far as hiding the family’s financial status, believing it will build character. But what happens when those children grow up and discover the truth?

One of our readers shared her emotional story of how a simple visit to her father’s office revealed a secret that changed everything.

I thought we were poor my entire childhood

Growing up, I always believed my family was struggling financially. Every time I asked for something — ballet lessons, school trips, or even a small birthday party — the answer was always the same: “We can’t afford it, sweetheart.” After hearing it so many times, I eventually stopped asking.

I gave up the things I wanted to help my family

Throughout my teenage years, I watched my friends enjoy hobbies, vacations, and celebrations while I learned to go without. When I reached college, I juggled part-time jobs to pay my way. I never experienced the carefree life many of my peers enjoyed. In my mind, I was simply doing what I had to do, because we had no other choice.

But a simple visit exposed a lifetime of lies

Last week, everything changed. I stopped by my dad’s office to drop off his favourite cookies. While waiting, I noticed one of his desk drawers was slightly open. Curiosity got the better of me. Inside were neatly stacked documents. When I pulled one out, my world came crashing down.

The papers revealed that my parents weren’t struggling at all. In fact, they owned multiple properties, had a large savings account, an impressive private investment portfolio, and many other assets. They had been financially secure for years, and I had never known.

A confrontation I never imagined

That night, I confronted them. My voice was shaking as I asked, “Why didn’t you tell me you had money? I gave up so much because I thought we were broke!” My mom looked away, silent. My dad let out a heavy sigh and said, “We didn’t want you to grow up spoiled. We thought if you believed we had money, you wouldn’t work hard. We planned to give it to you when the time was right.”

I had given up so much and I can never get it back

His words hit me harder than I expected. I could barely hold back tears as I replied, “But you could’ve supported me, and you chose not to.” They insisted it was all for my own good — to build character, to make me strong. But in that moment, all I could think about were the countless lost opportunities: the dreams I never chased, the memories I never made, and the experiences I sacrificed.

Once again I did what I had to do even though it hurt me

That night, I packed a bag and walked out. I needed space — not just physically, but emotionally. Their intentions might have come from love, but their choices left me with deep wounds I wasn’t ready to forgive.

What we can learn from this:

• Honesty builds trust: Keeping secrets about money can damage the bond between parents and children.

• Hard work should be guided, not forced: Kids can learn responsibility while still receiving support and encouragement.

• Support shapes confidence: Helping children pursue their interests allows them to grow into capable, motivated adults.

• Deprivation isn’t character-building: Missing out on important experiences can leave lasting emotional scars.

• Financial literacy is important for children: Discussing finances in an age-appropriate way teaches kids how to handle money responsibly.

No one ever said parenting was a cake walk but done right, the habits we learn in childhood can pave the way for a more prosperous adulthood. Here are 11 money rules we wish we were taught in school.