10 Hilarious Amazon Reviews That Can Sell Products Better Than the Best Ad Campaign
Writing product reviews is an art in and of itself. And while some customers prefer being serious when speaking about the advantages and drawbacks of the items they’ve purchased, others unleash their creativity and generously season their reviews with humor and sarcasm. We found 10 Amazon reviews that made us laugh our heads off when we read them. It turns out some really cool products inspired this hilarity, and you can buy them right now if these humorous reviews have made an impression on you.
1. "It’s like an Apple Watch, only not."
This Casio digital watch is a real hit among Amazon customers. It can become an excellent gift with a retro vibe for the fans of good old classics. This model has an 8-digit calculator, a dual time mode, an alarm, a stopwatch, and an hourly time signal. It will sit comfortably on your wrist and look good with almost any outfit, thanks to its elegant and laconic look. The review below even highlights some features that make this watch similar to an Apple Watch, and they have a point!
4 out of 5 stars from @Ethan
It’s like an Apple Watch, only not. I’ve always wanted a calculator watch. Now that I’m pushing 30, I felt that I’m an adult and I can do what I want, and I want to buy a calculator watch. Yeah, I said it. You’re not my mom. Deal with it.
It’s great. It has dual time, a stopwatch, an alarm, it tells the date and the day of the week, AND IT HAS A CALCULATOR. If you wear it tightly enough, you can feel your pulse. So it’s like an Apple Watch only it costs under $20.
It has a 3-year manufacturer’s warranty, and the battery lasts 5 years. It doesn’t send text messages, but you can write words like: ’BOOBS’, ’BEES’, and ’SHOE.’ So if you’re a man of few words and your friend is right next to you, it’s basically the same as iMessage. I knocked off a star because the screen seems to lack some contrast. I’m not sure if it’s permanent or if the battery is low. I can’t recharge the battery, so I don’t know.
2. "They’re breeding!"
If one bathtub duck is not enough for you, how about buying a whole bunch? This set of tiny rubber ducks includes 50 cute squeaking and floating yellow ducks that’ll make both kids and adults jump for joy. The toys are made from safe and eco-friendly rubber, so babies can safely play with them. But be careful: once you buy this set of ducklings, you’ll be finding them everywhere, and the following review just proves it.
5 out of 5 stars from @Michelle
So, I bought these for my second oldest as she loves rubber ducks and was due to move out. I figured why not, they’re small, they’re cute, and it’s a fun present for her. She’s now moved out, and the ducks haven’t! My younger 2 have commandeered them, and I’m now finding these things EVERYWHERE! I swear they’re breeding!
Fun side note, when you step on one of these at 3 o’clock in the morning while making your way through a dark front room to go to the bathroom, and it squeaks... Well, let’s just say the bathroom trip is no longer required! Downside to these (apart from the 3 a.m. heart-attack-inducing squeak, and that they seem to breed), the squeakers in the base of them do come out so if you have young children playing with them, keep a close eye on them.
Other than that, if you love mini ducks, don’t mind finding them more than you do that glitter you dropped in 1984 and still can’t get rid of, and want to have that feeling there’s a duck somewhere watching you, these are most definitely for you!
3. "I found it somewhat hard on my teeth."
This squeaky chew toy shaped like a carrot was made to keep your pooch entertained for hours. It’s a brilliant interactive dog toy with a built-in squeaker that will rouse your dog’s interest, and it’s perfect for fetch play with your dog. The item is made from safe, natural rubber with a milk flavor that will greatly motivate your pet and prolong playtime. The toy is great for releasing dogs’ stress and reducing their destructive behavior. If you’re going to play with your dog using this toy, however, pay attention to the review below and be careful.
4 out of 5 stars from @Andrew Edwards
Whilst the dog loved it, when it was my turn to catch it, I found it somewhat hard on my teeth. When I failed in catching, it hurt my forehead.
4. "I hate that cat, but his door is pretty cool."
This cat door is a nice and stylish way to let your cat in and out of the room when the doors are closed. The opening is wide enough to let your cat pass through without getting stuck, and at the same time it’s not eye-catching, and it won’t damage your door’s appearance. The cat door is super easy to install, and it can give your cat the freedom of movement they need (though sometimes felines can abuse that freedom, and the reviewer below knows what that means all too well).
5 out of 5 stars from @Rachel Ayn & Noel
Love this. I hate my wife’s cat, but it made my wife pretty happy that the cat can come into our bedroom at will now and claw the dogs while they sleep. I installed this in just a few minutes, threw some wood glue on to reinforce it, dried it for a few hours... boom! It’s sturdy and gets the job done. I hate that cat, but his door is pretty cool.
5. "It’s a great product, but it may lead to addiction."
If you’re a fan of bananas there’s a way to chop them super quickly and start enjoying them right away: banana slicer. With this simple tool it’s easy to cut your bananas uniformly to add them to your breakfast or fruit salad. Actually, you may find the tool so helpful and convenient to use that you’ll hardly be able to stop, like Hope from the preview below.
5 out of 5 stars from @Tammy
I gave one as a gift to my best friend Hope. After watching her slice single bananas with several knives stuck between all her fingers in a Wolverine-like fashion, I knew it was an accident waiting to happen. Enter: banana slicer. It’s like a Swiss Army knife, but the kind of Swiss Army knife that only works on peeled bananas.
It’s super easy to clean... Because you don’t really have to. I mean, what’s the point of cleaning something in constant use anyway?
Unfortunately, I think she’s addicted now. She’s even moved onto slicing other sliceable foods. Boiled eggs. Hot dogs. String cheese. What psycho cuts string cheese anyway??? On the rare occasion she’s not using it, she hooks it to a chain around her neck, walking around the neighborhood boasting about her banana slicer... I’m sorry, Hope.
6. "Fork for liquid foods."
This set of 12 stainless-steel spoons can become a nice addition to your cutlery collection, and you can use them for everyday meals or for serving dinners on special occasions. Their elegant style with rounded handles will say to your guests that you have good taste and that you pay too much attention to detail. Well, these spoons are cool, of course, but who knew an item like a spoon could evoke so many emotions, like in the next review?
5 out of 5 stars from @HoshiYuki
Fork for liquid foods. Before buying this amazing tool, eating soups was pure torture. Every time, trying to catch as much soup as I could with my fork took so many endless and unfruitful hours. And if that wasn’t enough, my soup would get cold before I could get to eat it!
Now, thanks to this revolutionary tool, every soup becomes an unforgettable sensory experience! What’s more, if my water is too cold, now I can just scoop it out and drink it sip by sip. What a joy, I never thought something so small could change my life in such a big way! I highly recommend this time-efficient tool for your everyday life!
7. "It’s so good, my cat hates it!"
If you want to pamper your cat, take a look at this cat bed with scratching posts. The plush hammock bed makes it super cozy and comfy to lie in it, while the jute fiber scratching posts keep your cat’s nails healthy (and away from your furniture). If your cat doesn’t pay any attention to this bed at first, don’t get frustrated. Cats are often naughty and aloof — it may take a while for your gift to win their attention, and the next review proves it.
5 out of 5 stars from @Amazon Customer
It’s so good my cat hates it! This thing is awesome! It’s super easy to put together, and it’s great quality you can tell will last. It’s super sturdy.
It’s so good, my cat doesn’t even bat an eye at it! Because ya know, she’s a cat and cats are just so unappreciative! Anyway, I’m glad I purchased this. Hopefully, in moments when she wants to be a jerk and dig her claws into our sofa, she’ll just scratch this instead!
8. "It’s fun, but too fun, so I will have to keep topping up."
There’s no way for your cat to feel bored when you buy them this gorgeous set of 21 cat toys with a tunnel. Your feline will spend hours of fun playing with these toys, chewing, chasing, scratching, and catching them. The borderline between pampering your pets and spoiling them can be blurred, and sometimes we set the bar too high when we buy our cats and dogs fancy toys. The bar was surely set too high for the author of the review below.
5 out of 5 stars from @Fahmida
It’s fun but too fun, so I will have to keep topping up. It took a day for my 9-week-old kitten to get comfortable enough to start testing all of the toys, and I feel like I may have to purchase multiple packs. Right now, his favorites are the ones that make noise and the paper balls. He enjoys chasing them around and pouncing on them.
Today he’s having fun with the tunnel. It’s flimsy and rolls around, but he’s enjoying jumping inside it and rolling inside it. The only issue is it’s been a day since we got the package, and I’m down to 17 toys and have no idea where he’s put the rest.
9. "I don’t know what black ice smells like.“
A tree-shaped item with a strong smell is probably the first thing that comes into mind when you hear the words “car air freshener.” Well, this car air freshener looks just like that, so it’s a classic. The seller offers more than 30 fragrances to choose from for the best smell in your car. Some of the offered smells sound very exotic, like the one mentioned in the following review. It’s called “black ice.” The review sounds sarcastic enough, but the author gives this air freshener a 5-star review anyway, so we assume this was a good purchase.
5 out of 5 stars from @Carlos Spicyweiner
I don’t know what black ice smells like, but I want to avoid it at all costs if it’s anything like this air freshener. Sure, my car smells like a blend of mysterious chemicals and disappointment, but at least it’s not stale fast food and sweaty gym clothes anymore. The tree-shaped design adds a touch of nature to my ride, which is ironic considering the fragrance is about as natural as a plastic plant. Overall, this air freshener is for you if you want to make your car smell like a sketchy petrol station toilet.
10. "Crust what I kneaded."
With Amazon anything’s possible, even wearing bread loaves on your feet. These novelty slippers can become an awesome gift for yourself or someone special. The cotton layer inside and foam base make these slippers super comfy too. They look so realistic that it’s almost impossible to unsee loaves of bread behind them, and the next reviewer knows exactly what we’re talking about.
5 out of 5 stars from @J
Crust what I kneaded. Dough not wait on these. I was worried they might be half-baked, but they’re a perfect fit. The delivery was so fast they were still warm from the oven.
It’s like having 2 soft brioches you can chuck your feet into and loaf around the house. They look even more delicious than I expected. You won’t find butter slippers out there, crust me. I might crumb back and get some more as gifts for all the family. It’s the yeast they deserve.
Find 10 more products from Amazon with uproarious reviews here.
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