A Woman Refuses to Attend Her Sister-in-Law’s Wedding Because of a Dress Code, and Here Is What Happens Next

Family & kids
8 months ago

Weddings are supposed to be joyful occasions, but sometimes they can also cause misunderstandings and drama. That’s what happened to a woman who refused to attend her sister-in-law’s wedding because of a dress code that she found unreasonable and unfair. In this article, we will tell you this woman’s story about what the dress code was, why she rejected it, and what happened next.

This is what the character of our article shared on Reddit, “I am having a conflict with my husband’s sister. She is getting married in 2 weeks and her dress code is incredibly complicated to adhere to for me. It is black tie, long sleeves, and floor length gowns. The conflict happened because I am currently 34 weeks pregnant and overheat very quickly, and the wedding is entirely outside, in the middle of the day. I cannot be in a long-sleeved floor-length gown in the heat for 8 hours.”

“I have sent her a few dresses to try to compromise, but she is completely adamant about exactly what she wants.

I told her yesterday that I cannot attend her wedding if she is not going to budge even slightly on the dress code. I told her she has the right to have her wedding exactly how she wants it, for it to be her perfect day, but I have the right to look out for my own health.”

Black tie is for evening , inside, where there’s air conditioning, not day. A long sleeve floor length gown outside in Summer, good lord, I have a thyroid problem & have trouble regulating my body heat, I’m so hot all the time, nearly everything I own is sleeveless, I would die in that get up. I would have gone in the requested gown then “ fainted” as she was walking down the aisle.


“She freaked out at me and told me I was being incredibly selfish and that ‘for once it isn’t about me and my baby’ which she only said because she’s jealous I’m having the first grandchild, and she felt like she should have had a baby before me and my husband.

Since then my husband’s side of the family has told me I’m being selfish and to just compromise one day to keep the peace. I don’t think I should need to compromise my health for her wedding.

Am I being unreasonable?”

P.S. “My husband has been incredibly supportive and has tried to shield me as much as possible, and has told his sister that he’s not subject his wife and baby to that, he’s been great. He’s also told me he’s not going to go, and it’s her wedding. Neither of us are in the party we’re just guests.

But also I’ve told her black tie isn’t for a noon wedding in a field (which is where this wedding is).”

Reddit users have supported the character of our article. Here are some of the comments she got:

  • Pregnant woman here! There is no way I would be able to adhere to her dress code. Today I just went outside in just a t-shirt and jeggings in 84F heat, and I was overheating, and I wasn’t out for 8 hrs. When you’re pregnant your temperature is already higher than normal, without being forced to wear black tie attire. Apart_Foundation1702 / Reddit
  • Non-pregnant women here and there is no way I would be able to adhere to that dress code, even if the wedding was indoors with AC, unless the AC was the best AC in the world at set to max cooling, keeping the entire place at 65 degrees (or less). I do not do well in heat and generally run very hot. So wearing a floor-length dress with long sleeves would have me melted into a puddle very quickly. Rose_K91 / Reddit
  • Frankly, as a Southerner, she should have known that black tie is ABSOLUTELY NOT for daytime wear (it’s only for after 6 p.m.). So OP’s SIL is just wrong in all sorts of ways. GothicGingerbread / Reddit

People have different wishes for their weddings. There are those who even wear “naked” wedding dresses and feel happy about it.

Preview photo credit throwawaythechanges / Reddit


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As a Singaporean, if I ever needed to join a wedding like so in Singapore, I will break down in laughter before asking the couple if they are crazy or they didn't tell me that the wedding was indoors. You simply can't survive like that


OP's SIL has lost her mind. I can't believe anyone who is willing to endure the heat in formal wear, in a field, at noon, how crazy. I also would never be angry at any pregnant woman who didn't want to attend an activity, you never know what they're going through on their journey. Any number of things could be making a pregnant woman uncomfortable without the addition of out of climate dress code and a harsh environment for the venue. I definitely would've had to pass if it were me as well. SIL and respective family members need to get their heads out of their butts and come up for air. Her standards are ridiculous. She has no reason to be upset that her pregnant SIL can't attend due to her conditions.


First, the dress code is ludicrous and to subject anyone to long sleeves in the heat of the day is wrong on so many levels.

Second, black tie is after 6, not outdoors in the middle of the day. The bride clearly has no taste nor does she have any respect for her SIL or her guests.


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