After a Major Heartbreak, Emma Thompson Found the Formula of Eternal Love

Emma Thompson is an award-winning actress who has given us moving performances that have brought tears of joy or sadness to our eyes. Her love life has also been full of ups and downs. A public scandal forced her to reconsider what love is, and thanks to that fresh perspective, she finally found her soulmate — Greg Wise, her husband of 20 years.

In one of the greatest Christmas comedies of all time, Love Actually, Emma’s character feels overwhelmed after discovering that her husband, Harry, played by Alan Rickman, is being unfaithful to her with his secretary, Mia.

Thompson’s powerful performance turned the scene into something memorable, and after several years, she finally revealed that her performance was very real because she had experienced the same thing with her first husband, Kenneth Branagh.

In an interview, the actress explained that although she was working with her husband on a movie at the time of the revelation, she “was utterly, utterly blind to the fact that he had relationships with other women on set.” She said, “What I learned was how easy it is to be blinded by your own desire to deceive yourself.”

After it was publicly revealed that her husband was cheating on her with the actress Helena Bonham Carter, Emma went into depression: “I was half alive. Any sense of being a lovable or worthy person had gone completely.”

What was happening in the movie was like a copy of what she felt in real life. “That scene where my character is standing by the bed crying is so familiar because it’s something everyone has been through,” she said.

“Ken really broke my heart. So I knew what it was like to find a necklace that wasn’t for me. Well, it wasn’t exactly like that, but we’ve all been there.”

Emma was heartbroken but managed to overcome this and make peace with both her husband and Helena.

They both acted in the Harry Potter films and other productions. Before filming began on one of their movies, Emma confessed that she had “made peace” with the actress who played Bellatrix Lestrange. “You can’t hold on to anything like that,” she said. “It’s pointless. I haven’t got the energy for it. Helena and I made our peace years and years ago.”

Sometime after the infidelity, while acting on the set of the movie Sense and Sensibility, the actress met Greg Wise, one of her co-stars. By her own admission, he was the one “who picked up the pieces and put them back together.”

About how they ended up together, Emma explained on a TV show that a friend of Greg’s had told him that he was going to meet his future partner on the set of the movie. He thought his friend was referring to Kate Winslet, another co-star, and even dated her once. However, Kate got bored on the date and told him he should go out with Emma, especially since she had just ended her marriage. Greg eventually went out with her and they fell in love. Eight years after starting the relationship, the couple finally married in 2003.

Her previous experience taught Emma to take things differently this time. In a recent interview, the actress commented that she now has a different perspective on love.

“It’s philosophically helpful and uplifting to remember that romantic love is a myth and quite dangerous. We really do have to take it with a massive pinch of salt. To think sensibly about love and the way it can grow is essential. Long-term relationships are hugely difficult and complicated! If anyone thinks that happily ever after has a place in our lives, forget it!”

Emma Thompson seems to have found the secret to marital bliss — she’s been married to her husband for 20 years, and they seem to be doing quite well. Emma feels the key to any long-lasting relationship is to be pragmatic, and she illustrated this point when asked who in her household controlled the TV remote:

“Neither of us [Emma and her husband Greg Wise] has any kind of relationship with the remote. Both of us spend the entire time wandering around, clapping our hands on the carpet, going, ’Where’s the remote?’ We’re both utterly pathetic,” she replied.

In another interview, Emma was asked what the secret to a lasting marriage was, and she said:

“In a marriage, there are periods when you are happy. I think a long-term marriage goes through different stages. You go through hard times and then you pick yourself up. I think enduring a long marriage is very difficult, and not many stories are written about that.”

For Emma, the secret is to forget about “happily ever after” and think about a relationship that will go through many ups and downs. Knowing this will help us to be prepared to face these issues and overcome the 20-year barrier, as she and her husband have done.

Every couple goes through unique circumstances, but learning about the experience of others can help us get an idea of how to react to similar situations. You can read about the love stories of Barbra Streisand, Liam Neeson, Hugh Jackman, Harrison Ford, and other couples that could serve as inspiration in your own relationship.