I Banned My Husband from Sending Money to His Mother — She Claims I Ruined Her

Today’s story focuses on a wife who, feeling sidelined in her marriage, decides to take a stand against her husband’s habitual financial support to his mother. This choice, intended to protect their immediate family’s well-being, sets off a chain of emotional consequences, leading to accusations and hurt feelings.

She explained what happened.

I’m and my husband Matteo and I have been married for four months and have been together for three years. While we were dating, his mom occasionally called to ask him for money, anywhere from $2,000 to $6,000. He explained that this had been going on for years, but since he had a high-paying job, he didn’t mind giving her the money.

My father-in-law is a successful businessman, and they have joint accounts, which always made me wonder why she needed to ask Matteo for cash. When we got engaged, we discussed her financial requests, and my husband agreed to stop sending money. He followed through, and she stopped calling when he refused her requests.

However, last Tuesday, my MIL called and asked Matteo for $15,000, saying she needed it for a vacation. When he declined, she sent me a long text accusing me of interfering in her relationship with her son. I didn’t reply. Concerned, I asked my husband if his parents were struggling financially, but he said everything seemed fine.

Today, during lunch with my father-in-law and sister-in-law, I brought up the subject. My FIL was helping us choose wine when I casually asked if everything was okay at home. He looked puzzled, so my husband explained about the recent money request.

That’s when everything unraveled. It turned out that my MIL had been secretly asking Matteo for cash for quite some time. My FIL revealed that she had been withdrawing money from their joint account last year, claiming it was to help with our wedding costs—a lie, as we never received any money from her.

My FIL immediately left, and a few hours later, my MIL called in tears, accusing me of ruining her life by "spilling everything." My FIL later wrote us a check to repay the money, and he’s now temporarily separated from her until he can trust her again. Meanwhile, my husband’s maternal relatives are blaming me, calling me the bad guy.

People stood on her side.

• "You’re not the one who has been lying and leeching for money. Hope your FIL divorces her." Unknown author / Reddit
• "You asked out of concern, and you brought what sounds like tens of thousands of dollars in spending to his attention that she had been hiding, for whatever reasons. If she needed the money for a good reason, she wouldn't have been lying about it." Bubbly_Chicken_9358 / Reddit
• "You busted a gold-digging scammer, out of concern and love for your husband and his father. It’s natural to feel guilty for upsetting someone, and for big life changes to happen to others. But sometimes it’s necessary to upset someone and change circumstances." HippieMama710 / Reddit

• "The maternal relatives that are calling you a bad guy were probably the ones benefiting from the money." TheLastWord63 / Reddit
• "If anyone ruined your mother-in-law's life, it was herself." ZealandRedSquirrel / Reddit
• "You’re not a bank, neither is your husband, MIL has misused the trust of her son and husband. Seems like she wants to have power over her son and uses the money method to know that." Grgivmy / Reddit

As this situation unfolds, it becomes evident that such difficult decisions are sometimes necessary for the health and stability of a marriage. The story highlights the importance of communication, mutual respect, and clear boundaries in maintaining both familial ties and the strength of a marital partnership.