I Don’t Allow Screen Time for My Son— Now He’s a Loner

Parents always try to do what is right for their kids. It could be giving them healthy meals, a good education, and going on fun trips. In this case, a mom tried to keep her son off the internet. Reducing screen time is a step in the right direction, but in some scenarios, it may backfire.

I banned screen time.

I thought I was right to ban my son from having screen time. Now, he’s getting quieter. Last week, he told me he sometimes eats lunch alone. When I asked if he was okay, he said, “It’s all your fault!”

I went to his school and discovered it’s actually my son who doesn’t want to make friends with the other kids. He says no to every invite to eat lunch with classmates or play with them.

My son has become excluded.

I asked one of the moms in the class group chat (we used to be close) if she could help by encouraging her kid to keep trying to include my son. She hesitated, then said gently, “He’s just... hard to include. The other boys don’t know what to talk about with him.”

Turns out the other kids all bond over things I’ve kept him away from—YouTube shows, Minecraft, Marvel movies, TikTok trends. Stuff I thought was “junk.” I felt so defensive at first, like I wanted to scream, “Why should I have to lower my values just for him to be liked?”

But then I looked at him that night, curled up reading a book alone, and it hit me—I made him different. On purpose. And now I’m mad at the world for noticing.

Creating the right balance is becoming increasingly hard.

I feel like I built this perfectly safe little bubble for him, but I forgot to make sure he could breathe outside of it. I don’t want to change everything about how we live, but I also don’t want my son to feel like he’s always on the outside looking in.

So now I’m stuck trying to figure out how to let the world in just enough, without feeling like I failed as a mom. I honestly don’t know what the right balance is anymore. Any advice?

This is a very common issue for parents.

Parents in today’s digital age have to think of how much is too much when it comes to screen time. Completely isolating your child can often make them feel like an outsider, but immersing them on the internet could make them easily vulnerable to other issues.

Teach smart watching, not avoidance.

Instead of just saying “no” to everything, teach your child how to think about what they watch. Sit with them during a show, talk about what they liked, what felt unrealistic, what they learned. This is all about giving them the tools to choose wisely.

Try to be open to his interests.

Letting your kid watch a popular show or try a trendy game doesn’t mean you’ve “lost.” It means you’re giving them a way to connect with their peers. Take a look at what they’re interested in—you’re bound to find a family-friendly game he can enjoy playing within a reasonable time frame.

Set your rules.

There’s no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to setting screen time rules. Start by making sure any media your child interacts with is high-quality. Don’t just focus on how much time they spend on screens. Encourage them to enjoy offline playtime too.

Set screen-free times—like during family meals or an hour before bed. You can even use apps to set screen time limits if needed. Make sure screens stay out of bedrooms, especially at night. Charging devices outside their room is an easy way to avoid late-night scrolling. And when they do use screens, keep an eye on background noise—constant TV can be distracting.

Screens are a part of life, and that’s okay. The trick is finding a balance. And don’t forget, kids learn by watching, so being a good role model with your own screen habits goes a long way. That said, here are some tips to help limit your child’s screen time.