I Refuse to Sacrifice My Happiness to Save My Grandson

I would have been the last person on the earth to be selfish and enjoy myself. I would have preferred to give even my last penny to save my grand child.

I would give my last penny for my kids or grandkids.

My grandchildren mean more to me than a cruise or life itself.I would sacrifice anything for them.

truly its that generation . family is so much higher than a vacation. hopefully they do keep this person well away from younger . don't want to have younger learn that habit of selfishness

Because they don't want to spent their vacation money on the kid. your son has some nerve!! it's not your responsibility to pay his debts.

It says "the treatments" are expensive, so I'm going to assume that he will be fine but the parents will go into debt paying for his treatments, that comes with having kids. Blackmailing the grandmother with "you'll never see us again" is horrible. This lady has one foot in the grave and wants to spend some time with her sister before she can't and she never ask them to give her money for this trip, (I'm pretty sure she's done a lot for them to where that would even be a reasonable request) but now that they've run into some money problems they not only expect her to just hand it over, they threaten her with "withholding love"??? What is that? Go get a lone from the bank, and let grandmom go on a trip with her sister.

This is senior abuse and manipulation! The law would be on your side! It's called the "Bank of Mom". I don't think you're wrong to go on a cruise and your son's behaviour is inexcusable. He obviously feels "entitled".

with that attitude from your son, go an enjoy your trip.

Your grandson is your blood. If I were I will sacrifice my pleasure for the life of precious grandson.

Enjoy your trip. There is insurance, hardship loans, hospital assistance,Medicaid, etc. I would be ashamed to ask my mother who has been saving for years to sacrifice her trip.

The smirk and threats would have done it for me to be honest. Does your son's family not have adequate health insurance? You do realize that most children's health insurance will pay for most if not all of your grandsons care? Most hospitals can tap other providers like Shriners and non-profit groups associated with the illness he is being treated for as well as gas/hotel vouchers, assistance with rental/mortgage, electric ect., ..so are you sure your money is needed, or if this is your son knowing you have the extra cash and is using his child to bully you so he does not have to ask for help from organizations set up for this purpose? Additionaly, as he is asking for your money you have the right to ask where said money is going, and even make those payments yourself as you are not likely to get it back from someone who is not beyond be manipulative and cruel when demanding you just had it over or else. If he refuses to give any info and proof of where your money will be spent, I would go on the trip and let him figure it out. Even a part time job would be on the table before asking a relative for money that I might not be able to to pay back or can pay over time as his son will not be denied care in the interim.

I don't understand your son, why hasn't he and his wife saved up money or did a go fund me for the kid. Why would I make you choose a trip over your grandchild when if I'm responsible I have saved like you.

Is this a fabricated story?
First of all: My family would never ask for my money - I would offer it immediately. But that's me and my relationship with my kids and grandchildren.

Personally I would give all that I have. Then I would try and raise money for a cruise later. I really hope the grandson is well and that she get the cruise she always wanted.

I can't understand anyone that would put fun over the life of a child that is the most heartless thing I ever heard what if the child dies your fun will last for 2 weeks but the child will be dead you will carry this for the rest of your life how could you not know this at your old age put your self in that child's place how would you feel if your grand parent did it to you wwjd you have to die and face the lord better wake up

What a stormy ride!!!, I personally feel like this is a test, this lady is going through. I respect all these comments and I agree with both sides of the story. I believe that you asked for advice because you are a kind person after all.

If I was in your shoes, I would use my savings to pay for the ill child.... You might be an angel that was being set up to be ready to rescue, you have an opportunity to do it, you are the only one with a life raft in your hands.

It's your money, spend the way you want to; if they don't want to let you meet with their kid, it's their decision and they have the right..so why to fuss about it? Your husband died before you for a reason:) get sun tan on cruise just promise me that you gonna wear bikini thong..... ( I personally think this is a fabricated story to spice up comment box)

Personally, I would gladly help my grandson. I couldn't live with myself if something bad happened and I did nothing to help.

Yes your are the most selfish person I've ever seen. What a hateful self centered person

I am a grandmother and I would sell my kidney if my grand baby had cancer and needed money how do you weigh your grand baby to a week vacation really lady there is something wrong with you!!! What that kid is going thru and will have to endure is unimaginable and you’re worried about a vacation!!! You are 72 years old have you never taken a vacation I doubt it but your grand baby has never had cancer and needs all the love and support he can get!!! Start a go fund me page do some other fundraiser HELP your son and family you are so selfish

People saying not enough info? 8 yrs old, grandson Gravely Ill and vacation instead is all the Info needed. I hope you go on your cruise and you enjoy yourself while you're grandson is suffering and could die but remember this when you are in a dank nasty nursing home dying alone because you chose to go on a cruise 🤘

I work in hospitals and previously in a few Nursing Homes,and for experience.Most sons and or daughters they wont hesite in putting you their parents in a nursing home if you become a little bit of nuisance and you will be in their way,even if u r very close and they love you , but they wont love you enough if you are an inconvenience and your condition will interfier with their ability to their social,work or family
That Son of you will

Betty your son and daughter in-law have decided that they should have a family and they should be responsible for them, if they need more money then they should get second jobs , third jobs, work from home jobs at night after you finish your other jobs down size homes, move closer to hospital, sell their cars get cheap ones, take out a loan, refinance your homie there are so many things they could be doing rather than ask their mother who raised and sacrificed for him to spend money it took YEARS TO SAVE he should be ashamed of himself I am sure you have taken your grandkids for weekends over nights and baby sat during days you do your part I am sure meanwhile you probably aren't paid for those times they are adults they need to take responsibility for their kids there is even charitable organizations to help let you enjoy your hard earned money YOU DESERVE TO HAVE YOUR TIME NOW THEY ARE GRANDKIDS NOT KIDS AND FOR THEM TO WITH HOLD FURTHER VISITS IS DOWN RIGHT WRONG NOT TO MENTION IT SHOWS THEY ARE ASKING FOR SOMETHING THEY KNOW IS WRONG TO ASK FOR LASTLY I SAY HEY STOP BEING A SPONGE AND GROW UP YOU HAD Those KIDS YOU PAY FOR THEM SHE PAID FOR YOU ITS THAT ENOUGH SHE Doesn't ASK YOU TO PAY FOR HER TRIP BUT SHE SHOULD HAVE ASKED YOU CAUSE AS FAR AS I AM CONCERNED YOU TAKE CARE OF THE ELDERLY LIKE THEY ARE YOUR CHILDREN CAUSE THATS HOW LIFE CYCLES WORK MY ELDERLY MOTHER LIVES WITH ME AND SHE PAYS FOR NOTHING AND SHE SAVES HER Money AND DOES WHAT SHE WANTS WITH IT HER AND MY KIDS JUST GOT BACK FROM A TRIP TO NIAGARA FALLS A TRIP SHE SURPRISED THEM WITH AND PAID FOR WHY CAUSE SHE COULD AND WANTED TO CAUSE WE TAKE CARE OF HER !!!!!

That is horrible, there is nothing I would not do for my babies. Idon't know how you live with yourself. I pray this child is ok, and no I would not allow you to see him

I cannot believe you chose a trip over your grandson! Would you be able to live with yourself if something terrible happens to him and you could have helped! He might not have time in his life for a trip, but I am sure you have many fond memories of trips you have taken. Honestly, I cannot agree more with your son!

It's not even a choice. What kind of grandparent chooses a holiday over the well being of their grand child. Absolutely heartbreaking.
I will give my life for my kids and any grandchild I may be blessed with.

You ask "Am I not allowed to enjoy life a little , I'm old this may be my last trip." Think of this, you have had 72 years of living, memories, and I find it hard to believe this would be your first trip. Your grandson is 8,, I guess if you can live with the thoughts of him not having all of the years ahead of him that you've enjoyed, graduating from school, having a career, maybe getting married someday by all means go on your trip, maybe you're the type that can deal with that. Having family means possibly sacrificing for them, and I find giving up a cruise a pretty small sacrifice for a life. There's nothing I wouldn't do for my 10 year old grandson.

Enjoy your cruise. Medical bills do payment plans and there's lots of financial aid. I'm a mom with 6 kids and a dozen grandkids so I'm well aware of when they try to bully me into doing what they want. That's really what's going on. Bullying is always wrong. Make some wonderful memories with your sister.

Family first!! Think about it, your out having a wonderful time, enjoying what you saved to do. Meanwhile your grandson fights his illness. Gee have a good time.

Tell your son that's ok Its my time to enjoy life Changing my will and I'm spending my money on myself I've earned it It was nice talking with you and have a good life

I'm sorry your grandson is so sick😥
I'm on your side 💯%
Hospital bills will be high, but they can pay what's affordable
I think hospitals charge so much because they know that they're getting less
You and your sister have a fabulous time, dance, sing, play slots,do the excursions
💥

If I can pay or borrow to take care of my child's medical care I would never ask my family for money unless they were wealty. If they offer fine.

This letter doesn't give enough information for me to make a unbiased judgement. Personally, I would give anything I could for a grandchild, but I have none and will never have any. What kind of illness does this child have, something the kid can recover from or something terminal? What are the kids parents circumstances? Why would they demand that she gives them her money? But also, why would you go on a cruise when a grandchild is gravely ill? Threatening someone with withholding visitation hurts everyone, but most of all the child. Get counseling for the parents on dealing with a very sick child and for the family, to be able to reconcile. Once someone's gone, either the kid or the older grandmother, they are gone and regrets last too long.

I think you're a very selfish person I would give my life if needed to save one of my kids or grandkids no matter what age I was

Here's a litmus test. Go on your vacation, enjoy yourself. While away on your cruise your grandson passes from his illness. Was that cruise the happy memory you thought? Will you shed a tear for him or "oh well I had fun"

I would sell my soul for my grandson. Yes, I think you are being selfish if his situation is that grave. Could he die?

Please enjoy your vacation,If your son dud not know your financial business he would not have ask.You have raise your children,you don't owe them anything.He is selfish,manipulative.If he chooses to make a sick decision for his son,eventually he will regret it scine his son will remind him of the opportunity he deny him of spending time with grandma especially if you die.Finally watch Midday Power Surge on you tube,it is time to separate from selfish family members and meet the real members of your family in Christ.

I'm wondering, didn't she teach him, that as a Man, he should be responsible for his own family, and be prepared for any potential problems, great or small ? If a Man cannot provide for his family, what ever life may bring, then maybe he isn't ready to have the responsibility of a wife and children ?

l will not hesitate to offer that money or even donate any of my organs if that will make my grandson survive and live. If your trip is so IMPORTANT than the life of your grandson, i hope u forget about having a family. U better off alone.

Aren't people worried that THESE are the tests that decide if we're going to heaven or the other place? Earthly possessions, sacrifice, sounds like she's closing in on the finish line of life and just got her final important test.

Are you kidding? You want to know if you’re selfish. WOW - not o ly are you super selfish your a narcissist. That poor little boy. I’d give my life for my children and my grandchildren. You must be a miserable person.

I think you are very selfish. Your family is struggling to pay for care for their little sick person and you put yourself first.
I am nearly 80 and have made many sacrifices for my family and would do it again in a heartbeat. The love, respect and support I have received in return has been priceless.
I don't blame your son for being bitter.
I hope you enjoy your cruise and the few superficial memories bought at such a huge expense

I think her son is out of line saying you don't have a family anymore how about getting a loan . did her son paid her phone bill and gas bill ins.food home payment car payment. if he did shame on grandma.i don't think so then why pay for his bills

You see stories like this on Reddit constantly. When it is a young healthy person being asked to donate their trip money/house down payment/college fund for a sibling/nibling/parent/friend the comments are always, "NTA it's your money the parents should've planned better", etc. Now that it's grandma's last hurrah, it's "you're selfish, save your dying grandchild". Smh...

Depends how you define happiness. For me family is everything. I love to travel but family comes first. Your priorities are different than mine.

The definition of selfish is a person, action, or motive lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.

Take yourself out of the equation. You hear about a Grandmother who put her trip before her grandchild’s life.

One's family should always be more important than a trip. If you have to write in to someone looking for approval of your actions, you already know you've been selfish. A trips more important than your grandchild, very sad.

There's an easy way to see if your selfish. Wait until your grandchild passes, then go on your vacation and see if your happy. Even if the vacation was to last a year. You choose a year of chilling in the sun with a mai tai over the potential 60+ years of life that your grandchild could have left. Yes 100% your selfish.

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