Balancing work and parenthood is never easy, especially when employers expect total flexibility without considering the real costs that come with it. Many working parents struggle to juggle work demands and childcare responsibilities, often feeling punished for simply trying to do both. Recently, one of our readers shared her story about what happened when she refused to go on a last-minute business trip without extra pay to cover her babysitter.
Hi Bright Side,
I’ll have to take a 5-day work trip instead of my colleague who had a last-minute emergency.
The trip is in just 2 days, and I’m a single mom with no one to look after my son on such short notice.
So I told my boss, “I need an extra $200/day to have my nanny babysit my 12-year-old.” After all, I’ll need the babysitter to stay with my son all day, and this is such short notice.
He smiled. I assumed it was done.
But the next day—shock! I came to the office, and there was an email from HR sent to all employees, saying:
“Dear colleagues,
We appreciate your dedication, but please note that the company is not responsible for your life outside of working hours. Covering personal or family expenses is not our obligation.
Any similar request will be considered an extortion of company resources.
Thank you”
Then I found another email, this time addressed directly to me, asking me to meet with my boss.
He told me my request was denied — and that I was free to refuse the trip, but it might impact my future in the company.
Now I’m torn. If I don’t go, I could lose opportunities — but if I do, I’ll have to pay $1,000 out of pocket for babysitting, just because my employer decided to send me away for work.
It feels deeply unfair. I’m doing my best to provide for my child, yet I’m being punished for needing childcare — something every working parent can relate to.
Should a company really be allowed to treat working moms like this?
What should I do?
Erin
With no if and or buts your child comes FIRST. PERIOD!!!!! If they can't understand that I'd find a job where you're respected and they need to realize your child comes before anything. PERIOD!!! they have some nerve. Who do they think they are Anyway? I'd tell them what they can do with their rules. Your child comes FIRST. PERIOD.
Thank you for your letter, Olivia. You’ve shared a situation that many working parents will deeply relate to — being expected to show complete professional flexibility while also managing all the personal responsibilities that come with raising a child. It’s unfair and exhausting.
Here is our advice to you:
If your job requires travel then it's not on the company to pay for your daycare. It's not on them during the day its not on them at night. Sounds like your were only asked because someone had an emergency. Now you've made a stand but it could cost you your career. I understand being a single mom and the expense but you have a big decision to make.
Under the law the company has no obligation to cover expenses for you. If you took this job that requires travel as part of the job that is on you if you had the child at the time. It is also up to you to find care for your child. Now realize I used to run a federal labor union representing 10,000 people. So everybody that's saying sue the boss is wrong everyone saying the boss is using this as a power Trip might be correct but it is also correct that the boss is within his legal rights and you have no legal rights here. You chose to have the child you are responsible for that child's care the company is not responsible for your private life or private obligation. I wouldn't go so far to say that you're extorting money but it is unreasonable for you to ask for them to cover your child care.
Should she not be paid for every hour she is requires to be away from home? If that happens then she should be able to afford a babysitter. I think the morality of this has more to do with how he is essentially threatening her advancement opportunities if she doesn't go.
Your boss doesn't see it as "EMOTIONAL" he sees it as a way to threaten your job because he knows you can't afford to lose it. If they want quality employees then they have to be willing to work WITH them. Why was your coworkers emergency any more important than the one that was being forced on you? The NLRB (National Labor Relations Board) may have something to say about it. If you want to keep being disrespected stay put. If not, start sending out resumes ASAP. Know your value and worth, because your current employer never will.
Your boss may have seen your request as emotional instead of professional.
Reframe it — explain that last-minute travel creates additional costs for parents and propose a fair policy, like a dependent care allowance or temporary travel bonus.
You’re not asking for sympathy, you’re highlighting a gap in company policy that affects many employees, not just you.
If refusing could risk your career, treat this as a strategic move instead of defeat.
Go on the trip, track every related expense (babysitting, meals, travel time), and submit a full reimbursement report afterward, attaching HR’s email denying your request.
This builds a written record showing how unfair policies affect working parents — evidence that could support future policy change or even legal protection if needed.
You’re not the only one balancing family and career demands. Talk privately with coworkers who are parents or caregivers. Together, propose small but realistic solutions — like flexible travel rotations, notice requirements, or partial childcare coverage.
A group proposal feels like teamwork, not complaint, and makes HR more likely to listen and act.
I totally disagree with your statement about availability over humanity. We can argue everything but ultimately a business is in business to do business and make money not to support its employees personal lives. I have seen several scenarios where they talk about HR promoting someone because they need the money because they have a sick child talk about a violation of low rule and regulation. The real win is realizing that your private life is private and that no company can accommodate every aspect of your life. The real win would be to work with the boss and say look I don't have the ability to leave my child and maybe another co-worker can take this over it's not about kindness or emotions it's about logic and law rule and regulation you had the child it's your responsibility you will have the requirement to balance work in life not the company
Their reaction says a lot — they value availability over humanity. Finish the trip professionally, but take time to reflect. Start exploring companies with parent-friendly policies or remote flexibility.
Sometimes the real win isn’t changing the system — it’s choosing a place that respects both your career and your role as a mom.
It’s important to pause every now and then and remember that kindness still exists in the world. These heartwarming stories remind us that kindness isn’t a weakness — it’s actually survival.
