My Grandkids Were Always Hungry and Their Vegan Mom Said It Was Normal

When it comes to parenting, everyone has strong opinions. But what happens when a grandparent sees signs that something is wrong? Do you speak up and risk tearing the family apart, or do you stay silent and hope things get better? One of our readers, Brooke, faced this heartbreaking dilemma when she noticed that her grandchildren were changing — and not for the better. She wrote to us with a story full of love, guilt, and impossible choices. Now she’s asking for our help in understanding whether she did the right thing. Here’s what she shared.

“Hello Bright Side.

My name is Brooke, and I need to tell you something that’s tearing me apart.

I may have lost my daughter forever. I may never see my grandchildren again.
But I couldn’t just stand by and watch them suffer in silence.

My daughter Sarah went vegan three years ago. It started as a personal choice — she said it was for her health, for the planet, for the animals. I respected that. I supported her. But over time, her lifestyle became a strict belief system. And it wasn’t just about her anymore.”

“She began to impose it on her children. No meat, no dairy, no eggs — not even honey. Not even when they came to visit. She packed their meals in little containers, gave me long lists of ’approved’ ingredients, and told me that under no circumstances was I to feed them anything else.

I tried. I really did. But the last time they came over, I almost didn’t recognize them.

My grandkids used to be energetic, running around the yard, laughing, always asking questions. But now they barely move. They looked like shadows of what they used to be.”

“That day, I was helping them with a puzzle when my grandson leaned in close and said he was still hungry. His voice was barely audible.

Before I could answer, his mom called from the kitchen and simply said: ’Stop it. You will adjust.’

I froze. Something inside me snapped. Those words weren’t firm — they were cold. Indifferent. My grandson’s face crumpled. He didn’t cry. He didn’t complain. He just looked... defeated.

I couldn’t stand it anymore when he turned to me and asked if I had any cheese. I knew it was ’forbidden.’ But what was I to do? Say no to a hungry child?

I made him a grilled cheese sandwich. And one for his little sister. They ate in silence. Quickly. Desperately. It was the first time I’d seen them smile all day.”

“When Sarah saw the empty plates, she lost control. She screamed at me — said I was poisoning them, undoing everything she’d worked for, disrespecting her as a mother. She grabbed her things and left, saying I’d never see her again.

And so far, she’s kept that promise.

I have tried to talk some sense into her, but to no avail. She doesn’t answer my calls, she doesn’t answer my messages, and when I go to her house there is never anyone there or no one answers the door. I know she is fine because other family members have told me so, and I know that maybe I should give her space, but the situation is starting to make me desperate. It doesn’t make sense to me.

Now I’m alone with my thoughts, and I keep asking myself: Did I do the right thing? Or did I betray my daughter? Is it ever okay to go against a parent’s rules... if you think those rules are hurting the children? I don’t know what to do. I miss my daughter. I miss my grandchildren. But most of all, I worry about them — how they’re eating, how they’re living, if they’re okay.

Please, tell me: Was I wrong to interfere? How do I apologize without pretending that what I saw wasn’t real? How can I make it right without turning my back on what I believe was an act of love? Thank you in advance.

— Brooke.”

Thank you, Brooke, for opening your heart and sharing such a personal and painful story with us. We know it’s never easy to talk about family tensions-especially when it involves your own child and grandchildren. Your courage in speaking out reflects how deeply you care. Many of our readers have faced similar situations where love, values, and boundaries collide in difficult ways. We hope the support of this community can help you find some peace and clarity.

Some advice for Brooke (and anyone in a similar situation).

• Lead with empathy: Try to see the situation through your daughter’s eyes. She probably thinks she’s doing what’s best, just like you do. Begin any future conversation with understanding, not blame.
• Apologize for how, not why: If you regret how the situation exploded, you can apologize for going against her wishes — while still calmly expressing your concerns. It’s possible to say “I’m sorry” without taking back what you believe.
• Focus on shared values: You both want the children to be healthy and happy. Emphasize this common goal when you talk to her again. Maybe there’s a middle ground where their health can be protected without judgment or extremes.
• Leave the door open: Even if your daughter is angry now, time and compassion can work wonders. Send occasional messages just to say you love her and miss her. Avoid pressure — just warmth.
• Take care of yourself, too: This situation is emotionally draining. Talk to a therapist or a trusted friend. You have shown incredible courage, but even strong hearts need support.

Family conflicts are never easy — especially when values, health and love are at stake. Brooke acted from the heart, but her actions had consequences she never imagined. What would you have done if you were her? Let us know in the comments — your perspective may help her find clarity and peace.

And if you’re interested in more real-life family dilemmas, don’t miss this powerful story.