I Started a Small Business at 65, but My Family Says I Should Just Babysit

Grandparents love spending time with their grandkids, but when there is a lack of respect for time and boundaries, the relationship we have with our family can suffer. One of our readers reached out to share how her son and his wife didn’t respect her new hobby.

This is Norah’s story.

Dear Bright Side,

After retiring, the relationship I had with my son and DIL changed. In their minds, weekends meant babysitting my grandson. I love him to bits and pieces and never had a problem with that. But it seems my son has a problem with me wanting to live my life.

Last month, I started playing a game I really enjoy. It was an online game I had heard people talking about, and I wanted to give it a chance. I had a lot of fun and even made a few new friends from all over the world. But I didn’t let it consume it. It was just a fun little pastime.

This weekend, I spoke to my DIL and told her about the YouTube channel created for it. She laughed and said, “Do you really think people will waste their time watching that? Or that you’ll make money with it?”

I was hurt and disappointed in her words. She didn’t even have the decency to pretend to be happy for me or to show an interest in my hobby. It was like I was just a free daycare option for her. It actually seemed to upset her, knowing I was doing something for myself.

That night, while still emotional, I started posting some videos I made online and the minute I did my following skyrocketed. People started asking me to livestream an upcoming event, and I was even approached by the developers. So I asked a few friends to help me the weekend of the event.

It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see my grandson, but they usually drop him off around 9 am and my friends could only come at certain times. So I asked my son to drop him off at 1 pm instead, and it wasn’t a permanent thing. It would only be for one day.

My son was furious and told me that he and my DIL are against it because they think it will distract me from babysitting their son. Then he hung up on me. It hurt to think that my son thought I’d neglect his child, but I wasn’t going to let that stop me. If only I knew how much this would affect our relationship.

The next day, my son angrily texted me saying, “Do you think it’s fair for my son to sit around while you play games? You can either be a grandmother or run a small business, but you can’t do both. If you keep gaming, I’ll find someone else to take care of the baby.”

I was floored but stuck to my plan. If he couldn’t be happy for me or accept me as I was, there was nothing I could do. So the weekend came and I was prepared for the event. But I was left speechless when I logged into the game and saw that my entire account had been deleted.

I called my son, and he admitted that he had done it because he feels “family should come first, no matter what.” He doesn’t care that he cost me my sponsorship and basically ruined my YouTube channel. All he cares about is having me as a babysitter.

So Bright Side, what should I do? Should I give up my hobby to save my relationship with my grandson? Or should I try to salvage my channel?

Regards,
Norah G.

Some advice from our Editorial team.

Dear Norah,

Thank you for reaching out to us and sharing your story. We understand how difficult this situation must be, especially since it feels like your son is forcing you to choose between your grandchild and your hobby.

Don’t give up the part of your life that makes you who you are just to keep someone else comfortable. What your son and DIL are really showing you isn’t about gaming, it’s about control. They’ve come to see your time as an extension of their convenience, and your new hobby disrupts that.

The healthiest thing you can do right now is draw a clear, kind boundary. Tell your son that your love for your grandson hasn’t changed, but you’re no longer available to be “on call.” You deserve the same respect for your time that any working adult gets.

Let your actions speak. Continue gaming, keep your business growing, and invite your grandson into that world when possible.

One day, he’ll see that his grandmother wasn’t choosing between family and passion. She was showing him that self-respect and independence are worth protecting, no matter your age.

Norah’s situation isn’t an easy one at all. But with a little acceptance and initiative from her son’s side, she could find a way that’s beneficial for everyone.

But she isn’t the only one who has issues when it comes to a grandchild. Another one of our readers shared their story. Read it here: My Daughter Refused to Let Me Hold My Grandchild — Her Reason Broke Me.