I Stopped Paying for My Kid’s Tuition to Finally Follow My Dreams

Being a parent means sacrifices, compromises, and pouring out love. But what happens when a mom decides to hit pause on all that and go after the dreams she’s kept on the back burner for years? Is it selfish to choose yourself, or is it exactly what you need to do sometimes? This story dives into that messy, controversial choice and asks—can you really follow your dreams and still call it love?

Thanks for sharing your story with us. We understand it’s tough, but maybe it’s not all lost—there’s still a chance to turn things around.

Talk to your son before he finds out.

• You’re worried about how he’ll react, and that's totally understandable. The key is to have an honest conversation with him before anyone else fills in the blanks. Let him know you’re not abandoning him but taking this step for your own growth. Remind him that you’ve always been there for him, and this is something you need to do for yourself, just as he will one day need to do for his own future.

Stand firm against family pressure.

• Your family’s response feels like a betrayal, but remember, they’re coming from their own expectations, not yours. It’s okay to set boundaries. You’ve spent your whole life prioritizing others—now it’s your turn. Firmly express that your decisions are yours to make, and while you appreciate their concern, you’re choosing to live for yourself, too.

Find creative solutions for his college fund.

• Despite the pressure of wanting to be there for your child, your dreams matter too. Look into scholarship options or help him explore other ways to finance his education. Maybe he can take on a part-time job or apply for work-study opportunities. Show him that while you’re following your dreams, you’re still thinking about his future.

Turn guilt into self-respect.

• Guilt will try to creep in, but remember: self-care doesn’t make you a bad mother. Your life has been all about your kids, and now it’s time for you to reclaim a piece of it. By pursuing your dreams, you’re teaching your son an important lesson—how to live authentically, take risks, and grow. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you don’t deserve to take this step.

Get your son involved in the conversation.

• It’s important to involve him in the process. Not just to explain your choice, but to ask for his support. Let him know you’re doing this not just for you, but for both of you. He may surprise you with understanding and even excitement. After all, your independence and joy will be something he can look up to, not feel abandoned by.

Remember why you're doing this.

• Look back on why you’ve made this choice. You’ve spent years putting your kids first, and now, finally, you’re allowing yourself to live. Think of this as an opportunity to rediscover who you are, and give yourself permission to live without guilt. When your son sees you happy, fulfilled, and free, it will shape him into a more independent and self-aware person too.

Sometimes, you have to make sacrifices to prioritize yourself, just like in this story.