I Took Off My Bra at Work and the Reactions Caught Me Completely Off Guard

In many professional environments where conformity is the unspoken rule, even the smallest acts of deviation can spark curiosity—or controversy. Choosing not to wear a bra beneath workplace attire might appear trivial to some, but to others, it’s a bold statement that challenges entrenched societal expectations. In this piece, we delve into a story from one of our readers who found herself in an unexpectedly awkward situation at her workplace, sparking a conversation about unspoken office norms.

She shared her story with us.

“Hello Bright Side,

I’m writing to you because I’m feeling quite bewildered by a recent experience at my job. I’ve been with my current company, a mid-sized tech firm with a fairly relaxed atmosphere, for nearly three years. Our dress code is generally smart casual, and I’ve always felt comfortable and respected.

Lately, things have been incredibly hectic. I was having one of those exhausting weeks at work, so I slipped off my bra for some relief. I was feeling overwhelmed with deadlines, and the idea of an underwire digging into me all day was just unbearable. I opted for a modest, opaque knit top — nothing revealing or inappropriate, in my opinion — layered under a cardigan, which I wore for most of the day. I genuinely believed my attire was professional and discreet.”

She noticed some attention but continued her choice.

“I noticed a few odd stares but decided to do the same the next day. By going bra-free, I did feel a sense of physical ease I hadn’t realized I was missing. So, I brushed all the stares off, thinking perhaps I was just imagining things or maybe someone was just curious about my new top.

I certainly didn’t think my choice of undergarment, or lack thereof, would become an issue, especially since my outer clothing was perfectly suitable for our office environment. The following day, I wore a similar outfit, again prioritizing comfort and professionalism.”

An unexpected confrontation arose.

“Everything seemed normal until mid-morning. I was deeply focused on a project when I saw our HR manager, Ms. Evans, approaching my desk. She’s usually very approachable, but she had a somewhat serious expression. My stomach did a little flip. This time, the HR person came over to say, ‘Could we have a quick word in my office, please?’

In her office, she explained, very politely, that a couple of colleagues had mentioned my ‘attire’ and that it had made them ‘uncomfortable’ because it was ‘noticeable’ that I wasn’t wearing a bra. She spoke about maintaining a ‘consistent professional appearance’ and implied that going braless might not align with that, even if not explicitly against any written dress code. I was stunned. I felt my cheeks flush. I had made sure my clothing was not sheer or overly tight. I was covered and, I thought, dressed appropriately. To be told my choice was ‘distracting’ or ‘unprofessional’ felt unfair and, frankly, a bit intrusive.

I left her office feeling confused and a little embarrassed. Is this a common workplace expectation I was unaware of? Was I in the wrong?”

Thank you for sharing your story with us. It’s understandable why you feel bewildered by this situation, especially when you felt your clothing was appropriate.

Here is our advice.

• Acknowledge the feedback, even if it feels off.
  Sometimes, in a workplace, perception can unfortunately become reality for some. While it feels unfair, acknowledging HR’s point (that someone felt uncomfortable) without necessarily agreeing that you were wrong can be a diplomatic first step. It shows you’re receptive, which can smooth things over.
• Consider comfy alternatives if that helps.
  If traditional bras are the main issue, there are loads of other options out there — think soft bralettes, camisoles with light support, or wireless styles. These could give you that comfort while also fitting in with what seems to be the office vibe.
• Seek clarity on “professional appearance” if you feel up to it.
  If you feel comfortable and the HR manager is approachable, you could consider a very brief, calm follow-up.
• Focus on your work and don’t let this define your experience.
  This was likely an awkward blip, not a reflection on your overall competence or value to the company. Your contributions are what truly matter.

Choosing not to wear a bra in the workplace may seem like a small, personal decision, but it opens the door to much larger conversations about autonomy and societal expectations. For some, it might appear to be a quiet act of defiance; for others, it highlights the persistent struggle to be accepted as one’s authentic self in professional spaces. Challenging outdated norms that restrict self-expression is key to fostering truly inclusive work environments. When people feel free to show up as they are—without judgment or pressure to conform—we move closer to building workplaces that value comfort, respect, and individuality for all.