My Dad Spent My College Fund on His New Wife’s Plastic Surgery

Emily reached out to us with a story that left her feeling betrayed and frustrated. She thought she had a college fund, only to discover that her dad had spent the money on his new wife’s plastic surgery. Now, she’s asking for advice on what to do next.

Here is Emily’s letter.

Hi Bright Side,

Ever since I was a kid, my dad promised me he was saving up for my college education. He always told me, “Don’t worry about student loans—I’ve got you covered.” So, I worked hard, got good grades, and was finally accepted into my dream university.

But when it was time to pay tuition, the truth came out.

I logged into the college fund account... and saw almost nothing left. Confused, I called my dad, thinking there had to be a mistake. That’s when he admitted it—he had spent the money on his new wife’s plastic surgery.

I was speechless. He tried to justify it and said, “She needed a confidence boost,” and that I could always take out loans like everyone else.

I was furious. This wasn’t about the money—it was about trust. He had been saving that fund for me for years, and then he threw it away for a cosmetic procedure. He didn’t even tell me. He just let me find out on my own.

I ended the call and haven’t spoken to him since. My mom and grandparents are trying to help me figure out another way to afford school, but I can’t shake the betrayal.

Was I wrong to cut him off? Because right now, I don’t see how I can ever forgive him.

— Emily

Here’s what we advise Emily.

Set boundaries and prioritize your well-being.

Emily, your dad’s actions were a huge betrayal, and it’s understandable that you don’t want to speak to him right now. It’s important to set clear boundaries to protect yourself emotionally.

If talking to him right now brings you more pain, it’s okay to take space. Boundaries don’t mean shutting him out forever—but they do mean protecting yourself from further hurt. If he reaches out, you can decide if and when you’re ready to have a conversation on your terms.

Explore other ways to fund your education.

Even though your dad’s decision put you in a tough spot, don’t let it stop you from going to college. There are still options available. Look into scholarships, grants, and work-study programs. If student loans are your only option, research the best ones with low interest rates and repayment plans that won’t put too much pressure on you later.

Your mom and grandparents seem supportive—talk to them about any financial help they might be able to offer, even if it’s just temporary. You still have a future, and there are ways to make it work.

Decide if you want to confront your dad.

Right now, you’re hurt and angry, which is completely justified. But at some point, you may want to have a conversation with your dad—not for his sake, but for yours. If you decide to talk to him, make sure you’re prepared for whatever response he gives. He might defend his decision, try to minimize the impact, or refuse to take responsibility.

On the other hand, he might genuinely feel guilty and be open to making things right. Either way, going into the conversation with clear expectations will help you decide what kind of relationship, if any, you want to have with him in the future.

Lean on people who truly support you.

Right now, you need people who are in your corner—family members, friends, or even a mentor who understands your situation. Talking to people who genuinely care about you will remind you that you’re not alone.

Let them help you process your feelings and, if possible, assist with your next steps. If you’re struggling with anger or resentment, journaling or even talking to a counselor could help you work through your emotions in a healthy way.

Don’t let this situation define your future.

It’s easy to feel like everything is falling apart, but this setback does not define your potential. Many people have had to overcome financial and personal hardships to get an education and build a successful life.

You are strong, and you will find a way forward. Yes, your path might be harder now, but with determination and resourcefulness, you will reach your goals. Don’t let your dad’s bad decision take away your future—keep pushing forward.

Think about whether rebuilding the relationship is possible.

Right now, cutting him off feels like the only option, and that’s understandable. But in the long run, you may want to consider if your relationship with your dad can be repaired. Is he willing to acknowledge what he did and make amends? Does he seem to understand how deeply he hurt you?

If he continues to dismiss your feelings or refuses to take responsibility, then keeping your distance might be the healthiest choice. But if he makes a real effort to earn back your trust, you can decide whether reconciliation is possible—on your own terms.

And before you leave, don’t forget to check out our other article about 9 diabetes warning signs you might be missing.