A woman, 35, has recently shared a very disturbing thing that happened in her family. She’s divorced and has a small daughter, who’s in contact with the woman’s ex-husband and his new girlfriend. Everything was fine, up until one day, when the mom revealed a detail about her daughter’s communication with her ex-husband’s SO. The woman considered this behavior very inappropriate and even shocking, so, she wrote us a letter, asking our readers for their opinions about this situation.
A woman named Vanessa, 35, has recently sent a letter to our editorial and all she wanted was to get as many opinions as she could about her very complex situation. The woman thinks she has a full right of feeling angry about what happened to her little daughter. On the other hand, she doesn’t want to do any harm and hurt anyone’s feelings with her reaction.
The woman opened her letter, saying, “My husband Josh and I split a year ago. Our divorce was of that kind, when other people could even get envious of how smoothly and delicately we made everything happen. In fact, none of us had feelings for each other anymore, and we lived together only for the sake of our little daughter, Miranda. But soon, we both wanted to start a new relationship, with other people, and we both felt it was time to turn the page of our marriage.”
Vanessa revealed, “We both put a lot of effort to ensure that our divorce wouldn’t take a toll on our daughter Miranda. Both of us have been spending a lot of time with the kid, participating in all her activities and making her the Queen of our souls, just like it was before. Miranda is a very smart little girl, we know she did understand that something was happening between us, but as soon as our behavior towards her didn’t change, she was quite relaxed about the whole thing.”
Vanessa goes on with her story, saying, “I am now dating a man, Frank, who’s not introduced to Miranda yet. I just decided to wait a little bit before I do it, because I need to make sure that everything is serious between us.
My ex also has a girlfriend, they’ve been in a relationship for 5 months. I haven’t met her in person, but Miranda does visit them, and I didn’t have any objections about their communication. On the contrary, I was happy that they bonded to such an extent that Miranda was praising Kylie (the girlfriend) and she does like her.”
Vanessa explained, “To make things even more clear, I was genuinely happy that my daughter has another wonderful woman in her life. I also wanted to meet Kylie in person one day and express my gratitude to her for being such a wonderful person and for her attitude to our daughter. I have no jealousy, I’m absolutely relaxed about this woman being in the life of my ex and my daughter. But one thing did make me angry and disappointed.”
Vanessa continues her story, saying, “Miranda often visits her dad and Kylie, and she adores spending time with them. Her dad comes to pick her up 3 times a week, sometimes even more often. I always know where they’ve been together and what they’ve done, this is important for me, and my ex-husband knows about this, so he tells me about their activities and Miranda adds up some nice details, too.”
The woman shared, “I know that Kylie would sometimes take care of Miranda in many ways, like combing her hair or buying her some lingerie. I was okay with that. But last week, Miranda went to visit them and when she came home, I could see that something was wrong with the kid.”
Vanessa revealed, “When I asked Miranda, very carefully, what happened to her and why she was so sad, she told me that she lost her rubber duckling and that’s why she was so disappointed. I asked her why she ever took her rubber duckling to her dad’s place, because this duckling was meant only for taking baths and showers, this was my little daughter’s habit. But, as far as I knew, she didn’t take it anywhere except to the shower.
And this was the moment when Miranda told me that Kylie bathed her. And this happened many times, and this time they lost her duckling somewhere in Kylie’s bathroom.”
Vanessa wrote, “I’m furious at the fact that Kylie bathed my daughter. What makes me even more angry is the fact that she did it multiple times. So, this was not an emergency, this was the normal thing in her relationship with my infant daughter. I feel totally weird about this. I believe that this circumstance is inappropriate and a boundary of bathing my child unless in emergency circumstances needs to be set.”
The woman said, “I’m extremely supportive of Kylie being involved in any other less intimate aspects while communicating with our child, but I feel like I need to openly express my concerns and forbid her to bathe Miranda. Do you think I am overreacting? Should I express my thoughts to my ex-husband or Kylie directly, or should I ignore the whole thing and pretend that I don’t care? What would you do if you were in my shoes?”
And here’s a confession from a woman, who appeared to be a married man’s lover, and she ruined his family. She expected a paradise in her relationship with her SO, but now she revealed why it all turned into one huge nightmare.
I have raised 10 children, 3 birth and 7 fosters with a current total of 18 his, hers, ours grandchildren from among them. What I find disturbing is that this woman is concerned about this female child being supervised in bath time by a woman rather than by a man. I certainly would prefer the bath of a female child be conducted by a female.
I think this is a weird thing to get so upset about. This sounds like totally normal behavior to me.
Unless she comes home saying things that are concerning about bath time I really don’t see the issue.
Are the visits only supposed to be a few hours? Is it multiple days? One day/night? If the visits are only supposed to be for a few hours, then yeah, it's weird and crossing the line that the girlfriend is consistently bathing your child. She needs to knock that off.
Though, I do find it weird regardless due to how long the ex and girlfriend have been dating. They've been dating for 5 months by the time this has been written and they're already moved in together? At this point, gf should only really be visiting and ex should be the one bathing your kid if it's a longer stay.
