My Father-in-Law’s Disgusting Behavior Is Making Me Sick

Family & kids
month ago

Life can throw unexpected challenges our way. When it does, we're often left with a choice: stay silent and endure, or speak up and seek a solution. Emily, a young woman, finds herself in a particularly awkward situation. Her usually reserved father-in-law has begun sending her secretive gifts and messages. She's shared her story with us, seeking guidance.

This is Emily’s letter:

It seems like dad is infatuated with you..
you can dm him on facebook saying why are you sending me gifts and talking like this to me, because it makes me feel uncomfortable and I would appreciate if you stop.
If he replies with sorry it won't happen again and the gifts stop then just let it go
But if he continues then you have no choice but to say something to your husband

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Reply

Thanks for sharing your story with us, Emily! We’ve prepared some tips that we hope can be useful.

Set clear boundaries.

Initiate a private conversation with your father-in-law, expressing your discomfort with his recent gestures. Politely but firmly communicate that while you appreciate his attempts at friendliness, his actions, particularly the gifts and messages, cross personal boundaries.

Emphasize that you value your relationship with him, but need him to respect your space and privacy moving forward.

Involve a neutral third party.

Consider seeking guidance from a trusted family member or friend who can provide objective insight into the situation. Discuss your concerns with them and ask for their perspective on the best course of action.

Sometimes, an outside viewpoint can offer clarity and help you devise a strategy for addressing the issue sensitively while protecting your relationship with both your husband and his father.

Document and discuss with your husband.

Day One I would have approached hubby and asked if he knows why his dad is doing this. Now there's a hole addressing why you didn't do that up front. Its becoming a mountain.

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Reply

Keep a record of the instances that have made you uncomfortable, including dates, times, and details of the gifts and messages. Present this documentation to your husband in a calm and non-accusatory manner.

Express your feelings openly and honestly, emphasizing your desire to address the situation together as a team. Together, brainstorm potential solutions and decide on a unified approach to address the behavior with your father-in-law.

Seek professional mediation.

If the situation escalates, or you find it challenging to address directly, consider enlisting the help of a professional mediator or counselor. A trained mediator can facilitate a constructive dialogue between you, your husband, and his father, providing a safe and neutral space for all parties to express their concerns and perspectives.

This approach can help navigate complex emotions and dynamics while working towards a resolution that respects everyone's boundaries and relationships.

Holly, like Emily, is dealing with in-law issues, but her situation is very different. She's feeling worn out after her in-laws started dropping by for lunch too often. To ease the burden, she suggested they pay a fee. But things didn't go as planned. Here's her story.

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