My Father-in-Law Never Paid the Bill, So I Gave Him a Taste of His Own Behavior

We’ve all encountered that one person who never seems to pay their share—but what if that person is your own father-in-law? Tired of constantly footing the bill, one man decided it was time to put an end to the free rides. He set a plan in motion, determined to teach his father-in-law a lesson. But now, he’s left wondering—did he handle it the right way, or did he cross the line?

Hi Bright Side,

I could really use your advice on handling a difficult family member. My father-in-law has been pushing my limits, and I’m wondering if I handled the situation appropriately or if I overstepped.

Here’s the situation: My in-laws live nearby, but when my father-in-law visits, always stays over. My father-in-law, in particular, has a habit that’s driving me crazy—whenever we go out, whether it’s for dinner, golf, or even a quick coffee run, he never reaches for his wallet and makes me pay for everything. He either conveniently “forgets it” or makes jokes about how I should be treating him since I have a steady income.

I’ve covered his expenses countless times, even when he’s promised to pay me back—but, of course, he never does. Last night, we went out to a nice steakhouse again, and as expected, he sat back when the bill came he said he forgot his wallet and waited for me to pick it up. What he didn’t know that I decided enough was enough.

Before we left, I told him straight up that I wouldn’t be paying this time. Just to test him, I “accidentally” left my wallet at home. When the bill came, I acted just as surprised as he usually does and said, “I forgot my wallet.” Turns out he didn’t left his wallet at home and had to pay for everything. The look on his face was priceless—he was furious and claimed I embarrassed him.

Now, my wife thinks I went too far, but I feel like I just gave him a taste of his own medicine. Did I handle this the wrong way?

All the best,
Mark

Thanks for reaching out for help, Mark. We hope that our advice can give you a fresh perspective on how to handle this situation.

Why do people don’t like to spend money:

People may underspend for several reasons. Fear of running out of money, often shaped by past financial hardships or a deep-seated fear of poverty, can make spending difficult. Lifelong habits of saving and frugality can also be hard to break, even when circumstances improve. Additionally, a lack of confidence in financial planning may lead people to save excessively as a precaution.

How to deal with the in-laws:

Navigating relationships with in-laws can be challenging, but establishing clear boundaries is essential for maintaining harmony. Open communication between partners about family dynamics helps prevent misunderstandings and emotional reactions.

Creating your own family traditions and spaces fosters independence while respecting in-law relationships. Handling unsolicited advice with neutral responses can deflect potential conflicts. If in-laws are unsupportive or detrimental to the marriage, it may be necessary to limit interactions to protect the marital bond.

How to set boundaries with a freeloader:

Handling a freeloader family member can be tough, but setting clear expectations upfront helps prevent awkward situations. It’s important to stay firm and refuse to cover for them, as giving in only encourages their behavior.

Avoid lending money or agreeing to be paid back later, since moochers often have excuses ready. If the problem continues, have an honest conversation about how their behavior affects the bond. If they refuse to change, it may be best to distance yourself.

Here’s how you can handle things more easily next time:

• Make him pay first: Suggest activities where he has to pay upfront, like booking tickets for a show. When he’s already spent money, it’ll be harder for him to avoid paying later.
• Choose a cheaper way to do things together: Offer plans that don’t involve expensive dinners. Cook together, watch a movie, or find free events nearby. You’ll still have a good time without spending too much.
• Pick places together: If he likes fancy spots, suggest planning as a family and say, “I’m on a budget this time. Let’s pick a place that works for all of you.” This helps keep things fair.
• Try his trick: Next time, just before leaving, say you forgot your wallet too, and see how he reacts. It might make him realize how it feels!

Even though family should be a source of support, this man shared how his sister-in-law’s attempt to expose a family secret ended up backfiring.