My Husband and I Pretend to Be Poor and My Family Thinks We’re Struggling

Money can complicate family relationships in unexpected ways. In this story, a couple decides to fake being poor to avoid family members constantly asking for money. What started as a small lie to keep their inheritance private has now turned into a full-on act. Now, things are getting harder to hide, and our reader doesn't know what to do.

Our reader dropped us a message.

Thank you for reaching out! We understand this is a tricky situation, and we're here to offer our support.

Think it through.

Take some time to think about the pros and cons of keeping up this act. If pretending to be broke has helped you avoid a lot of family drama, maybe it’s worth continuing. If the lies are starting to stress you out, it might be time to reconsider. Think about what’s more important — keeping the peace or being honest and living without the burden of hiding things.

Draw the line.

If you decide to come clean, you’re still going to need some solid boundaries. Letting your family know your true financial situation doesn’t mean you have to share your money. Be clear about how you’re willing to help and what you won’t do. Make it known that your finances are off-limits for discussion and that you won’t be giving out loans.

Tell only half of the truth.

If fully coming clean seems too risky, consider telling a partial truth. You could say that you’ve been struggling but recently got a small break financially, which explains things like the new car. This way, you can ease the pressure without fully revealing your financial status. It might make things easier to manage.

Plan a slow transition.

If you’re finding it harder to keep up the act but don’t want to come clean right away, try slowly transitioning out of the “broke” narrative. Stop accepting charity from your family, and maybe mention that things are getting better for you financially. This way, it won’t be as much of a shock if they start to notice signs that you’re doing well.

Family arguments over food can get messy fast. In this story, a reader tries to respect her vegan daughter’s lifestyle by keeping their meals separate, but things take a turn when the daughter decides to throw away all the meat dishes. What started as an attempt to accommodate her daughter’s choices quickly spirals into a bigger conflict.