Financial matters can stir disagreements even among the closest couples. Bethany can finally purchase her own house but refuses to let her husband co-own it because she bought it with her family’s money. Her decision angered her husband, and his words unsettled her. She reached out to us for advice.
If he can come up with half, then he can be a co-owner. Sorry, seen too many women get taken in these situations.
Partnerships disolve. People pass away. Cheating occurs.
Maybe taking half your money as a down payment would have been a better solution. Then he could put his name on a mortgag. Just giving someone a house just bothers me. He has no incentive invested. Suppose he sold his part? You would have to buy him out. Talk to an attorney before giving him half. Protect yourself and your future first. Then a marriage consultant might help too!
Fastest way to destroy a marriage is get territorial with money and play the “My Money vs. Your Money” game. All monies belong to both husband and wife the same, also how can he NOT be co owner of the house, he would be required to be on the deed and the homeowners policy for insurance since they are married. I don’t understand why his wife is so hesitant to do this, what is she afraid of with him co owning their house with her?
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Thanks for sharing your story with us, Bethany! We’ve prepared some tips that we hope can be useful.
Given the complexity of the situation, it’s crucial to consult with a lawyer specializing in inheritance and property law. They can provide you with personalized guidance on how to navigate the legal aspects of your inheritance and ensure that your rights and wishes are protected.
Understanding your legal standing can empower you to make informed decisions about how to proceed with purchasing the house.
Sit down with your husband and have an open, honest conversation about your feelings, concerns, and desires regarding the inheritance and the house purchase. Express your gratitude for his financial support over the years, but also make it clear that the inheritance is a separate matter related to your family and your late father.
Discuss potential compromises or alternative solutions that could satisfy both of your needs and concerns, such as creating a clear agreement for how the house will be owned and managed.
If you repay half of what he put into "keeping" you, you could put a value on the work YOU put into child and homecare.
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Emotions can run high in situations involving money, inheritance, and relationships. Consider seeking the support of a couples therapist or counselor who can help facilitate productive discussions and provide guidance on how to navigate this challenging time together.
A neutral third party can offer insights and strategies for resolving conflicts and strengthening your relationship as you make important decisions about your future.
While your husband has been the sole financial provider, it’s essential to recognize the value of your contributions to the household, such as caregiving and homemaking.
Discuss with your husband the idea of fair compensation for your non-financial contributions over the years. This could involve negotiating a fair division of assets or exploring options for you to have a stake in the new home that reflects both your financial and non-financial contributions to the family unit.
Kate is another woman who found herself in an argument with her husband over financial matters. Her husband refuses to pay his stepson’s tuition, yet he plans to buy an expensive car for his own daughter’s 16th birthday. Kate believes this is unfair and has reached out to us for advice. You can read her story here.
