My Husband Wants a Divorce Because I BREASTFEED Our SON — His Reason is Sick

The journey of childbirth is not for the faint-hearted, a reality every partner should brace for when preparing for a shared delivery. Today, we meet a woman whose life was akin to a fairy tale, until the arrival of her long-awaited baby brought unexpected challenges. Seeking guidance, she reached out to our editorial team, sharing her story and seeking advice on navigating the difficult situation unfolding within her family.

We received an anonymous letter in our editorial with a request for advice.

The hero of our article is a 30-year-old woman who preferred to stay anonymous (editor’s note: the names used in this story are fictitious). In her letter, she recounted a situation that should have been a happy milestone in their family life, if it hadn’t been overshadowed by her husband’s betrayal.

The woman starts a letter, “We’ve been together for 6 years, and recently I gave birth to our first child. During my pregnancy, Mark and I decided to go through labor together. We attended all the prenatal classes, read parenting books, and planned everything meticulously. I thought we were on the same page, excited to welcome our baby into the world as a team.”

“The delivery day arrived, and despite the pain and exhaustion, holding our newborn son was the most joyous moment of my life. Mark seemed ecstatic, his eyes filled with tears of pride and love. He held our baby boy gently, cooing and marveling at his tiny features. It felt like the culmination of all our dreams, and I believed our bond had strengthened through this shared experience.”

However, the blissful moment didn’t last long.

The woman continues her story, “A few hours later, I started breastfeeding our baby boy. When Mark walked in, his face clouded with an expression I couldn’t quite understand, as if he was about to vomit. He stood there, pale and shocked, watching us, before abruptly turning away. He suddenly ran out of the room and completely vanished.”

"For the next three hours, I searched the hospital, asking the staff if they had seen him and repeatedly calling his phone without any response. Saying I was furious would be an understatement. This was not how I imagined spending the day of my child’s birth. By evening, I received a text from him saying, “What you did is disgusting. You made me feel like I was cheated on.”

“This is what he wrote me after.”

Her husband felt betrayed.

“At that moment, it felt like the ground fell out from under me. I had prepared for anything, but not this. I was at a loss for words. How could nurturing our son be seen as a betrayal? I tried to explain the natural bond between mother and child, and the importance of breastfeeding for our baby’s health and development. But Mark didn’t budge. He was stuck in a loop of jealousy and confusion.”

“The weeks that followed were filled with arguments, tears, and failed attempts at making peace. Mark’s feelings stayed the same. He felt excluded and replaced by our son, and my efforts to calm him only made things worse.”

The woman tried to save her marriage, but her husband’s beliefs were too strong.

“We tried counseling, but even the therapist couldn’t change Mark’s irrational belief. His sense of betrayal ran too deep, overshadowing the love we once had. He started spending more time away from home, avoiding me while I nursed our son, and retreating into his world of hurt and resentment.”

“The next few months were a blur of legal proceedings, moving out, and adjusting to life as a single mother. Mark and I only talked when we had to, and the emotional distance between us became permanent. The most interesting fact is that he still wants 50/50 custody.”

Concluding her letter, she writes, “I don’t know if any of your readers have faced this, but maybe they can give me some advice. I love my husband, and this reason for divorce seems completely ridiculous to me. Should I try to save our marriage, or is it time to let go?”

We’d advise you to give her spouse some time and seek for professional help.

First, let us say how sorry we are that you’re going through such a difficult and confusing time. Dealing with marital issues, especially those that seem irrational, is incredibly tough. It’s clear from your message how much you love your husband and how important your marriage is to you.

You mentioned that counseling hasn’t worked so far, but it might be worth trying again with a different therapist. Sometimes, finding the right professional can make a big difference. A therapist can help mediate the conversation and provide tools to better communicate and understand each other’s viewpoints.

Provide your husband with credible information about the benefits of breastfeeding for your baby’s health. Sometimes fears or misunderstandings stem from a lack of knowledge or societal misconceptions. Reassure him that breastfeeding is a natural, healthy, and essential part of nurturing your child, not a betrayal.

Ultimately, the choice to stay or leave is deeply personal. If you decide to try and save your marriage, make sure both of you are committed to working through the issues together. If you decide to let go, do so knowing that you’ve done your best and that your well-being, as well as your child’s, is paramount.

Remember, it’s okay to seek happiness and stability for yourself and your baby. You deserve a supportive partner who respects your choices as a mother.

We hope that our readers can also offer you advice.

Our other reader wrote to Bright Side to tell her heart-wrenching story of friendship and betrayal when she broke up with her fiancé right before the wedding after reading a note from her maid of honor.