10 Ways to Win the Minds and Hearts of People Without Saying a Single Word
If you want to convince someone of something, speak in a low voice. Low-pitched voices have more influence on people and work when trying to make them agree with you. At the same time, don’t forget about using pauses and changing the volume of your voice, drawing attention to the most important moments. All these tips show people that you know what you’re talking about.
Bright Side decided to find out what helps famous people stay calm and relaxed when talking to each other and which of their secrets we can adopt and use in our everyday lives.
Not hiding from their audience
If you can choose whether to stand or sit in front of your audience, always choose to stand because it will give you a better choice of gestures that will influence the people you are speaking to.
Besides, there should be no walls between you and the audience: instead of standing at a podium, let the people see your entire body and show them that you have nothing to hide.
Showing their interest
Simply tilting your head can help you win someone’s trust. It shows that you are interested in the person or what they are talking about. And if someone else tilts their head, in order to find out what they are interested in: change the subject. If the tilt remains, it’s you they are interested in, not what you are talking about.
Mirroring body language
Thanks to mirroring, people can build better connections with others and make them believe that they share the same opinions. However, very often people mirror each other’s body language without even thinking about it.
Talking to everyone as equals
Height shows people’s status. This is why, in the past, people would remove their hats or bow their heads to become shorter. Bosses of big and small companies buy chairs with big backs to seem bigger than their employees.
So, if you want to create a positive atmosphere, you have to be on the same level as other people. Many celebrities use this simple trick. When you are sitting and you have a visitor, stand up and make eye contact. And if you are talking to a child, sit down to be on the same level with them.
Holding a purse, a glass, or other things in their left hand
Etiquette expert Myka Meier noticed that when entering a building or when attending an event, royal people try to hold their things in their left hands. This frees up the right hand for a handshake. This is what Princess Diana did and what Meghan Markle does now.
And if you are at a party, you can use a flat clutch as a tray for a glass while shaking hands with someone.
Watch their legs
As you probably know, it’s easier for attractive people to win people’s trust. Myka Meier recommends for men to keep their legs at hip-width and keep the soles of their shoes down to show everyone the best part of your shoes, instead of what you’ve stepped in.
Girls can use the famous royal position for legs — the legs look as if they are tied in the ankles and shins and tilted to the side. It’s important to keep the heels low.
When you are going on a job interview or to an important meeting, don’t wear things that cover your chest and your neck. Because according to ex-FBI agent Joe Navarro, these clothes make people feel like you have something to hide. This is why politicians often choose suits with low buttons that create an impression of honesty.
Trying to avoid awkward situations
Nothing ruins a good relationship like an awkward situation. One of them is when you go to kiss someone you know on the cheek, and you bump noses, or even worse, lips. To avoid these situations, Myka Meier recommends remembering this: always give your right cheek for the kiss and kiss others on the right cheek.
Not ignoring gender differences
Most of the time, men consider face-to-face conversations aggressive. This is why when you are talking to a man, it is better to be on his side: this way, the conversation will be more friendly. Women are less inclined to compete, so they like being face-to-face. When standing like this, they achieve several things:
- They get more information about the person because they can see them and can change something during a conversation, adapting to new information and the mood of their partner.
- They maintain eye contact and concentrate on each other.
- They show their partner that they are listening to them actively.
- They keep their partner’s attention better (there are fewer irritations and other information).
Not ignoring physical contact
Touching and hugging are more provocative, but also more powerful ways to affect someone. If someone touches you on the shoulder, you are more likely to see this person again because you will feel a connection with them.
Many celebrities use hugging and physical contact to become closer to someone. But there are some important things to remember:
- The same gesture might have different meanings. For example, touching a woman on the shoulder might be understood as support, aggression, or interest. It is important to watch the person’s reaction in order to not hurt their feelings.
- You have to consider the cultural differences and the social position of the person. If you have a higher position at a company and your colleagues are below you on the career ladder, your touches might be considered condescending.
- Physical contact can influence other people. A sports team where players often pat each other on the shoulders wins more often. But if you feel that physical contact may be unpleasant for a person, it is better to smile and just speak in a nice tone.
Is it easy for you to communicate with new people? Tell us about funny situations that happened when you first met new people.