I Refused to Listen to My Boss’s Personal Problems, and He Tried to Make Me Pay

Being close friends and confiding in your coworkers is one thing, but doing so with your boss is another thing. While sucking up to a boss is a more common dynamic, in Timothy’s case, it’s quite the opposite. His boss’ over-attachment has pushed him to making a grave decision.

This is Timothy’s struggle with his boss.

Dear Bright Side,

I’ve been working at this accounting firm for over a year. My boss was recently replaced by a new one and he’s insufferable. It all started with a team dinner that he hosted to get to know everyone. He seemed friendly.

But afterwards, it was a nightmare. He complained about his wife and kids to me 24/7. Even after work hours. My stress skyrocketed. He even called my wife and said, “How did you manage to find someone like Tim?”

It came to a point where he knocked on my door. Finally, I snapped. So, I told him while he was on my doorstep, “I’m not your therapist!” and slammed the door. I stopped replying to personal texts and blocked his personal messages during work hours.

I made it very clear: “I’m here for work. That’s it.” The next day, he retaliated. My promotion? Gone. Vacation? Denied.

I just smiled. He didn’t know that I had planned to compile every voicemail, every overshare, every meltdown, and send it straight to HR and the executive team.

Then I handed in my resignation. I know that he might’ve gotten fired for what he did, but he was close to the team, and they already never got along with me because I was too “introverted” for them.

But, I just don’t like making friends at work. I’m not sure if that’s a good mindset to have, or maybe it’s time to finally change it.

What do you think?

Yours,

Timothy H.

Your boss acted unprofessionally.

Thank you for sharing your story with us, Timothy. Your boss was definitely in the wrong here. He clearly overshared and lacked any ounce of professional behavior.

You did the right thing by reporting him to your HR department. While talking about your struggles can be okay, too much of it, especially in the workplace, is inappropriate.

Leaving the job might’ve been too impulsive of a decision.

You may have been fed up with your boss’s behavior, but quitting just after reporting him to HR does seem a bit excessive. Despite not ’getting along’ with your current team, leaving your role, without even finding another beforehand, may not have been the right call.

If your boss gets fired, you can easily tell your coworkers the whole story and explain why you were against him so much. If you share all of what happened, they could sympathize with you, but staying silent will just make you look like the person that was responsible for firing the friendly boss.

Finding friendship at work isn’t a bad thing at all.

If you don’t like having friends at work, that’s totally okay. Nevertheless, there are a myriad of benefits to opening up. For one, you’ll have more to look forward to when you go to work. Plus, fostering a good coworker friendship is better for work communication and may help get things done faster.

Another point, worth noting, is that making friends at work is perfect for networking. If you find yourself leaving a job, like you are now, a work friend may know someone that could help you look for a better role.

Boss problems come in all forms, from the overly attached, like in Timothy’s case, or the overly laid-back. Some bosses take it even further and actually schedule meetings at your own home, like this one. Creepy doesn’t even begin to describe this boss.