A woman, 21, has taken to Reddit to ask people for a piece of advice about her and her partner’s recent collision. She wrote that her boyfriend’s reaction to her outfit was too much for her, and now she doesn’t know how to react to his provocative behavior.
The woman’s partner was furious after he saw her outfit.
The woman began her post on Reddit, saying, «Me and my boyfriend James have been dating for around 3 years. He’s usually an incredible boyfriend.»
But then she revealed, that they did have a huge conflict recently. She explained, «The other night I dressed up to join my friends at a party hosted by our mutual friend whom we recently befriended. When James saw my outfit, which was a skirt a little above my knees and one of those backless crop tops, he told me that I can’t wear that because I’m taken, and I shouldn’t dress like it.»
The seemingly innocent thing turned into a huge conflict. The woman said, «We got into a fight that ended with him yelling, „Don’t you dare come to me crying when someone does something bad to you. You’ll deserve it!“ And he slammed the door when I walked out.»
Nothing bad happened at the party, and the woman’s outfit was noticed by everyone.
The woman continues her story, saying, «The party was great, and a few guys did approach me, but I rejected them with no problems and overall had lots of fun and an amazing time. A lot of people complimented my outfit and said that I looked amazing.»
The OP has mixed feelings about the whole situation now. She said that she did like all those compliments from other people, but at the same time she was uncomfortable. She wrote, «This all made me a little sad inside at the end because I wanted to hear that from James, my boyfriend. But maybe he was just temporarily jealous? Maybe all it was just a phase and once he understands that I will continue to dress however I want to..... he’ll accept it?»
The woman said clothes is just clothes for her, and she’s faithful to her partner.
The woman explained her attitude to her outfits, saying, «For those saying that I crave male attention, first of all I wore that outfit because I wanted to feel good for myself. Secondly, most or actually the majority of the people who complimented me were women and gay men. Just because I choose to wear revealing outfits doesn’t mean I’m doing it for male attention. Not everything that we women do revolves around men.»
She added, «I’ve dressed up in revealing outfits for years, including when my boyfriend met me. It was one of the things that attracted him to me. What I find funny, based on the comments saying that I shouldn’t dress like that, and I should respect my boyfriend, if a woman told her boyfriend or husband that he should stop wearing his hair a certain way or stop wearing attractive clothing that will make him look hot to other women, she would be controlling, no? Shouldn’t a good partner trust their partner to be faithful?»
She added a few details about her relationship, saying, «Also, I’d like to add, James has shown similar bouts of jealousy over the years, but they’ve all been temporary in the sense that they would fade away. He has never called me bad names before though, and never said anything even close as cruel as what he said that night. I am contemplating on breaking up with him, but it’s really hard for me because 3 years is a lot.»
People in the comments delivered their opinions, and there were many pieces of advice.
Mmmm...sounds like your boyfriend is controlling. What does he think you would have been wearing, full body clothing? Considering what he yelled at you, I would probably reevaluate my relationship with such a person. Don't know if you are engaged or not but his need for control over how you dress etc will escalate over time, and after you get married he will probably decide everything you get to do -who you get to meet etc. Think carefully if this is what you want to experience or if you want someone who trusts you that you can speak up if you are "molested".
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People in the comments mostly supported the woman. One person wrote, «Any man who says you’ll deserve if something bad happens to you when dress like that to a woman is not decent. You are worth more. Time to move on.»
Another person added, «I was walking my dog in the middle of winter, wearing a huge jacket and leggings. And I am lucky enough to live in a really good area, but STILL I had some random person telling me inappropriate things. My dog lost his mind and freaked out when he took a step towards me, and I basically ran home. I have never walked him at night again because my husband almost had a heart attack. And the worst thing is, I’m very petite, so even though I’m 30 I look very young. But yeah, it doesn’t matter what you are wearing. People who are creeps are creeps.»
And one more user said, «Exactly. Clothing has nothing to do with it. Vulnerability and opportunity does. It’s about the person, themselves, and how easy it is to take advantage of them. This is also why, and sadly, many bad deeds are committed by people the person knows. The person lets their guard down and becomes an easy target.»
And here’s yet another relationship drama, told by a woman, who accidentally learned a very creepy thing about her husband of 15 years.
