My Ex Wants Our Kids to Call His New Wife Mom—I Drew the Line

Imagine your own kids being told to call another woman “Mom”... and everyone expects you just to smile and accept it. That’s what I’m facing with my ex and his new wife. I tried to stay supportive, but it blew up into a scandal I never saw coming.

Here’s a story Victoria shared with us and our readers:

“Hi Bright Side,

My name’s Victoria, I’m 34 years old. It’s been 4 years since my divorce. Our two daughters, 7 and 5, adjusted well to their dad’s new wife, Bianca. I never made it an issue, and I’ve always supported their relationship with her. The girls visit their dad every weekend.

The problem started when Bianca pushed to be called ‘Mom.’ My daughters never did it, they only called her by her name. Then my ex suddenly told me that they must start calling her ‘Mom.’ I told him no, because well, they already have a mom.”

“Last week I went to pick the kids up from school, and as I walked toward them, they ran past me and yelled, ‘Mom, over here!’ They weren’t calling me. They were calling her. I froze. Bianca spun them around like it was the happiest thing in the world, and then my ex loudly said to the other parents, ‘They have two moms.’

I’m crushed. I feel betrayed by him, by her, and even by my own kids. I’m their mother, and they called someone else that word right in front of me. I can’t get the sound out of my head. Part of me wants to forbid visits, part of me wants to sit them down and tell them how hurt I am, but I don’t even know if that’s fair to them.

I just don’t know what to do. Do I let this continue? Do I put my foot down? Has anyone been through this?”

— Yours, Victoria D."

Bright Side readers delivered some honest opinions on the woman’s story:

The Bright Side community reacted in very different ways to Victoria’s story. Some of them were supportive, some were critical. Here are some of the top comments from our readers:

• Sunflower_88💛 This is heartbreaking. I can’t imagine the feeling of being replaced in your own kids’ eyes. You did the right thing, standing your ground.
• MomLife2025! Honestly, Bianca seems pushy. Kids need boundaries, and their mother should always be number one in their hearts. I’d be furious too.
• dad_of_three_99 From what you’ve said, it sounds like your ex is confusing the kids. They need stability, not to be told to call someone else Mom.
• RainbowCactus#7 I’m not sure I fully blame the kids. They’re just children caught in a confusing situation. The adults need to sort this out without guilt-tripping them.
• Victoria_Strong21 Feeling betrayed doesn’t make you a bad mom. You’re allowed to be hurt. Bianca and your ex crossed a line by putting you in this position.

• BarberFan_44 I feel a little for Bianca, too. Maybe she just wanted a closer relationship with the kids. Calling her Mom isn’t necessarily erasing you, it can be love expanding, not replacing.
• Heartstrings💔 Your ex’s behavior is shocking. He’s disregarding your feelings and trying to force the kids into a label they may not understand yet.
• CoffeeMom$13 I would consider a serious talk with a mediator. This can spiral if handled with emotion alone. You need clear rules for visits and respect for your role as mom.
• twistedfate_91 I hate to say it, but sometimes kids do pick up on who’s “winning” the affection game. Maybe it’s time to reflect on boundaries at home and at their dad’s, before it gets worse.

A piece of advice from the Bright Side team:

Dear Victoria,

It’s easy to react from hurt and feel betrayed, but sometimes the most powerful move isn’t stopping the visits or setting ultimatums. Instead, try reclaiming your role in a creative, emotional way that your kids can connect with. For example, establish a “special tradition” that is uniquely yours: a weekend ritual, a secret handshake, a storytelling night, or even a project they do only with you. This creates memories tied to you, rather than a title like “Mom.”

Also, consider turning the conversation into a guided reflection rather than confrontation: ask your kids what “Mom” means to them, how they see your role, and how they feel about the label. Children’s hearts often respond better to questions than to orders.

Finally, protect your own mental space: journals, letters to your kids (even if you don’t send them), or talking to a professional can help you process betrayal without punishing your relationship with them. Sometimes, the quietest, most consistent presence wins the long-term trust, far more than a shouted protest ever could.

— Bright Side

A mother is often the first hero in a child’s life, and her strength can be nothing short of inspiring. Time and again, we see emotional and heartwarming moments where she pushes past fear, pain, and limits to keep her child safe. These true stories capture unforgettable acts of love and courage, showing that when it comes to her little one, nothing can stand in a mother’s way.