I Excluded My MIL From My Childbirth—She Is Not My Priority

Families are where we first learn to love, and where we often first learn to scream into a pillow. Between the guilt-trips, unsolicited advice, and 27 unread messages from Aunt Marina about your “life choices,” it’s clear: family boundaries aren’t just helpful, they’re necessary for survival.

When a Reddit user had their first baby, they expected sleepless nights, diaper disasters, and the occasional emotional breakdown. What they <strong>didn’t anticipate was that their biggest challenge would come from two unexpected sources: Grandma and Grandpa.

All she wanted was time with her newborn son.

“It all started the day our son was born. I ended up having an unexpected C-section. Firstly, all the grandparents were upset about the lack of updates. Next, we decided we didn’t want any visitors after delivery.

Once my in-laws found out I was having a C-section, they texted my husband saying that they were coming to the hospital. My husband said that he felt that wasn’t a good idea and that they shouldn’t come. Then they texted saying they were at the hospital. My husband tried to speak to them, saying that I just came out of surgery, and I wasn’t completely aware, and nurses were coming in and out attending to me.

I barely had time with my son yet, but my MIL stormed into the hospital and tried to come in and see him. My husband had to put his foot down and say that it was still not a good idea, and he would prefer that they didn’t. They were upset about this, but days later he talked it out with them, and they said they understood.”

The in-laws, the parents, and the baby schedule.

“After two weeks, his parents started making a habit of texting the night before, saying, ‘We are coming over tomorrow.’ So my husband calls and asks them if we could agree on a day for them to come each week, that would be best for us to create some consistency and routine during the newborn stage.

Well, this upset his parents, and they started screaming at him on the phone about how if they are such a burden on our lives, then they will just give us space. They continued to claim that issues have been building up over time, but they wouldn’t say what those issues were and ended the call with ‘Don’t worry about it. Don’t worry about us. Bye.’

We are completely blindsided by this. My husband says he hasn’t heard his dad speak to him like that since he was a kid. We did not think that asking to schedule a day to visit would cause this much of a blow up...”

Since it’s a controversial Reddit story, many users wanted to share their opinion and replied to the post.

• One user said: “I am so sorry to hear this is happening to you during such a sensitive time for you and your husband! One thing I will say is that your husband is doing an amazing job supporting your new family! Tbh, my husband is the complete opposite with his family, and it was stressful for me when we had our firstborn.”
• Another user replied: “Ultimately it’s your child, not your parents/parents-in-law. They HAVE to be on your terms, not you on theirs. End of the day, you now have a family to look after, both husband and baby; they come first in the morning, afternoon, and night 24/7.”
• This Reddit user shared: “Honestly, you really are so lucky your husband is at the forefront (as he should be!) — I see so many stories on here about partners not handling their parents, and it really seems to be a relationship breaker.”
• And this Redditor said: “I could honestly see my FIL trying that, he’s gone behind our backs before when we’ve tried to set similar boundaries. Some people seem just to have a low tolerance for being told ‘no’ and act out in response.”

Setting boundaries isn’t about building walls. It’s about putting up welcome signs with clear visiting hours. Everyone deserves relationships where they are seen and heard, not steamrolled or scheduled like a family subscription. If you want to know how people react to boundaries, you could read these fascinating stories!