I Refuse to Be My Son’s Babysitter While He Travels for Work—I’m Not His Servant

We will love our children no matter what. They are part of our family, and we will do whatever we can for them because we treasure the relationship. But one of our readers reached out because she feels that her son had gone too far. Let’s see what she has to say.

This is Lindsey’s story.

Dear Bright Side,

My son and I have always been close, but the request he made when he called me last week left me stunned. The conversation went well until he said, “Mom, I need you to babysit for two weeks while I go on a business trip.”

I didn’t know how to respond because he doesn’t have any kids. So I thought he must be joking. Turns out he wasn’t. Apparently he’s been dating a woman for the last few months, and she has a young daughter.

He has kept it a secret from everyone because she didn’t want the child to get attached before she knew if it was going to work out or not. But something about this situation didn’t feel right. He had never mentioned this woman or her child to me, and now he wants me to watch her for two weeks.

It’s like he expects me to drop everything I had planned to play grandma to a child I didn’t know existed until he phoned. So I asked him why he had the sudden change of heart, and he said, “It’ll help me prove to her that my family’s supportive.”

I was stunned into silence. He wanted his family to be supportive of a woman who had been shutting us out for months. So I told him there was no way I would agree to it. I’m not going to become an instant grandma to a child that I didn’t know about, who isn’t even his.

If he wanted me to support this relationship and spend time with the child, he could do it the right way. Invite me over and introduce us, like anyone else would. And then I would consider babysitting the child if and when I had time.

He couldn’t expect anything more from me, considering that he had been lying to me this whole time. He got angry and accused me of “ruining his future.” I told him that he did that all by himself since he couldn’t stand up for what he believed was right like I raised him too.

But now I’m sitting here wondering if I made the right decision. So Bright Side, what’s your opinion? Did I overreact? Should I have agreed to take the child in? Or did I do the right thing by standing up for myself?

Regards,
Lindsey K.

A word of advice from our Editorial team.

Dear Lindsey,

Thank you for reaching out to us and sharing your story. We understand how frustrating a situation like this one can be, and how painful it must’ve been to find out that your son has been lying to you.

You absolutely did the right thing by saying no. Your son’s request wasn’t just surprising, it was asking way too much. He wanted you to step in as a parent to a child you’d never even met, all because he wanted to show his girlfriend that the family was “supportive.”

That’s not how support works. If he really wants your involvement, it should start with honesty and introductions, not secrets and pressure.

Babysitting isn’t a test of loyalty, it’s a big responsibility, and it’s okay to set limits. By standing your ground, you’re showing him that healthy relationships, with partners or family, are built on trust and respect, not shortcuts.

The situation that Lindsey is in is not easy. But she isn’t the only one who is having struggles with a child and the relationship they’re in.

Another one of our readers reached out with the story of her son. Read it here: My Son Refused to Speak to Me Without His Wife, Until It Blew Up in His Face.