I Absolutely Refuse to Delay My Retirement to Save My Spoiled Daughter and Her Son

We got a letter from Marge, 68, who spent decades working, raising her daughter alone, and helping her grandson. Now that she’s ready for peace, her daughter’s tantrums and ultimatums turn her life upside down. Read Marge’s story, she needs your thoughts and advice.

Here’s a letter Marge wrote to us:

Hi Bright Side,

I’m Marge, 68, retiring after 46 years of work. Finally, I can relax, garden, maybe try dancing, without being called back to cover someone else’s responsibilities. But there’s my daughter, Emily, 28. Single, a “beauty influencer” whose vlog makes nothing, with a 3-year-old son. Sweet kid, loved, but Emily doesn’t even know who the father is. When he was born, she cried in my arms, promising to change. She didn’t. Instead of daycare, I’ve been the fallback. Instead of basic needs, she buys makeup; instead of parenting, she posts hashtags. I’ve been paying for everything: rent, groceries, kid’s nutrition, therapy, toys, Internet, until last month, when I said: “I’m done. I’m retiring.”

She called me and begged to keep working, accused me of abandoning her and ruining three lives: hers, the baby’s, and her “career”. I said no. Then came the meltdown: “Prepare for the worst, mom!”

Next day, I was shocked when I got a call from a man claiming Emily had left the baby with him. He might be the father. She’d given him detailed instructions and gone to a city event. Panicked, he found my number on a medical form. I drove three hours, picked up my grandson, and faced a flood of texts: “You pushed me to this. You owe me help. I’m trying to build something for all of us.”

Now I realize I might be the only adult my grandson can count on. Was I heartless to step back, or foolish to ever think she’d grow up? What would you do?"

Bright Side community had a lot to say about Marge’s heart-wrenching situation:

• Sunny_Daze87
  Honestly, I don’t blame you at all, Marge. You’ve been carrying everyone for decades. It’s okay to step back.
• PixelPenguin_42
  Wow... I feel for the kid, but your daughter sounds completely unprepared. You can’t fix her, and it’s not your responsibility anymore.
• TeaTime404
  I get why she’s upset, but leaving a toddler with a man who might be the father while attending events? That’s beyond irresponsible. You did the right thing.

• c0ffeeaddict99
  I think you’re being too hard on her. She’s trying in her own messy way. Maybe a middle ground?
• LemonPoppy$
  I’d honestly be scared too. You’re right to prioritize your own retirement. You can’t rescue everyone forever.
• quietstorm__21
  Your daughter is an adult. You helped enough. She’ll have to face the consequences of her choices.

• NeonBasil7
  But Marge... the baby is three. He needs stability. I get retirement, but maybe some structured help instead of cutting everything off would’ve worked better?
• astro_nova
  I support you 100%. She treated your generosity like a given and still behaves like a teenager. You’ve earned a break.
• hummingbird_88
  This is complicated. I can’t fully side with either of you. She messed up, but he’s a child caught in the middle. Can you get temporary help for him while still stepping back?

Advice from Bright Side team:

Dear Marge,

It’s clear you’ve been carrying more than your share for decades, and stepping back doesn’t make you heartless; it makes you human. Set firm boundaries with your daughter and communicate them clearly, so she can’t guilt you into undoing your retirement. Consider arranging professional childcare or a trusted support network for your grandson, so he has stability without relying solely on you. Focus on reclaiming your life, but keep channels open for guidance, not control, to help your grandson thrive.

Some choices break your heart no matter what you decide and sometimes, love demands more sacrifice than we think we can bear. At Bright Side, we recently received a letter from Nina, a 55-year-old woman whose life suddenly demanded she choose between her lifelong dream and her precious five-year-old granddaughter. Nina found herself in an agonizing battle between loyalty, love, and self-respect.

This is not just a letter. It’s a mirror, reflecting the silent struggles, so many women carry inside. Nina’s story will pull you in, break you apart, and make you question what it truly means to love... and to live. Read Nina’s powerful confession here.