I Refused to Swap My Vacation for My Coworker—Even Though She's a Mom of Two

One guy found himself in an uncomfortable situation when his coworker, who happens to be a mom, asked him to swap vacation time. Things got even more complicated when his boss intervened. Was he wrong to say no? Take a closer look and decide for yourself.

Hello Bright Side,

I put in my vacation request long ago for a specific week. I had planned everything for months, down to the last detail—flights booked, hotel reservations made, and activities lined up. Everything was set, and I was eagerly anticipating my break. When my request was approved, I thought nothing could go wrong.
Then, last week, my coworker Lisa found out that her kids’ school break fell on the same week. She came up to me, all smiles, and asked if I’d want to swap my vacation with hers so she could take her kids on a trip. I hesitated but stayed polite, explaining that I had booked everything and most of it is non-refundable.

Her face quickly turned serious. “Seriously? Can’t you be a little flexible? It’s just you—it’s not like you have kids to think about.” That stung. I replied, trying to keep my voice calm, “Just because I don’t have kids doesn’t mean my time off doesn’t matter.” Her expression soured, and she muttered, “Must be nice to have so much freedom,” before walking off.
I assumed that the discussion was over. But since then, she’s barely spoken to me—cold glares, short responses, and a noticeable chill between us. She made it clear she wasn’t happy. And it didn’t stay between the two of us.

The next day, our boss called me into an unscheduled meeting and said, “I’ve been hearing things around the office. Lisa’s in a tough spot. She’s just trying to spend some time with her kids. Maybe you could’ve been more understanding and flexible with your vacation plans?”
I was honestly shocked. It felt like my plans and time didn’t matter simply because I don’t have kids. I stayed calm and responded, “I’m sorry, but I’ve already made non-refundable arrangements. My time off is important too.”
He seemed uncomfortable but didn’t push the issue any further. Still, the tension was thick as I walked out of the meeting feeling confused and blindsided.
So now I’m left wondering—did I make the wrong call? Was I really supposed to just cancel my carefully planned trip because Lisa has kids?

David

Hi David,

We totally understand your frustration. You made plans far in advance, and your time, money, and personal commitments should be respected. It’s completely fair to expect that.
When Lisa asked you to swap vacations, it was a big request that would have required you to cancel or change your own plans. While it’s admirable that she wants to spend time with her kids, your time is just as important. The assumption that your vacation doesn’t matter because you don’t have children is unfair, and you shouldn’t feel pressured into feeling guilty.
Your response was professional and reasonable, and it’s unfortunate that it resulted in such a negative reaction from Lisa. Even your boss’s intervention, while possibly well-intentioned, doesn’t take your needs into account.

Here’s some advice:

• Stand firm but stay professional: You’ve already made your position clear to Lisa, and it’s important to maintain your boundaries. Don’t let guilt make you second-guess your decision. You had every right not to cancel your non-refundable plans.
• See the bigger picture: While it’s easy to react emotionally, remember that you have a right to your time off just like anyone else. Yes, Lisa may be upset, and your boss might feel sympathy for her situation, but your needs are just as valid.
• Reflect on your relationship with your boss: It seems your boss might not fully understand your perspective. In the future, you might want to have an open conversation about how this situation made you feel and why it’s crucial for everyone’s personal time off to be respected, regardless of their family situation.

Best,
Bright Side

Workplaces can sometimes be full of drama, can’t they? It’s like a never-ending reality show with workplace politics, surprising twists, and unexpected conflicts. Stick with us for more unbelievable stories—at least your office might not be quite as dramatic!