I Refused to Train a Coworker — HR Came Knocking

3 weeks ago

I Refused to Train a Coworker — HR Came Knocking

We’ve all heard it: “Be a team player, just help out.” But sometimes “helping out” really means doing someone else’s job for free. One of our readers found herself in exactly that spot — years of great results, no promotion, and suddenly her boss wanted her to train a brand-new hire... without so much as a thank-you, let alone extra pay. What happened when she pushed back left her stunned — and HR right in the middle.

The letter:

“Hi Bright Side team,

I’ve been at my company for four years. Despite great results, I never got a promotion — just more work piled on. Last month, my boss introduced a new hire, Kelly, and casually said, ‘You’ll train her on everything you do.’ No raise, no title, just double the work.

I pushed back: ‘Happy to help her get started, but full training isn’t in my job description. If you want me to take that on, I’d expect a promotion or at least a pay adjustment.’ My boss wasn’t happy.

Two days later, HR called me in. I braced for the worst — but instead, they asked why I thought my boss wanted me to train Kelly so quickly. Turns out, upper management suspected he was planning to push me out and slot her in at a lower salary.

HR said they’d been watching, and my refusal gave them the red flag they needed. A month later, my boss was ‘reassigned,’ Kelly was moved under someone else, and I got an offer for an actual lead position — with a raise this time.”

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Jan Heaton

2 weeks ago

Good grief that's the first time I've heard of HR actually working on the side of the Emolpyee.

Do You Get Paid for Mandatory Training at Work?

👉 If you earn minimum wage (or close to it):
Your employer must pay you for training hours. Otherwise, your total pay could slip below the legal minimum — and that’s not allowed.

👉 If you earn above minimum wage:
Things get a little trickier. Sometimes training is already considered part of your pay. If it happens outside your regular hours, check your contract. If it’s unclear, talk to your manager or HR to confirm.

Psychological Effects of Being Asked to Train Without Recognition

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Robin Lavois

2 weeks ago

I'm not smart enough to handle all that psychological intrigue!!! If I didn't want to train a person who OBVIOUSLY was there to steal my job, I'd quit on the spot. Also, how could these 2 work together for 4 years without catching feelings for eachother or at least a little respect and caring??? I know the world can be strange but, Wow just wow!!! But yes, I'm poor, I'm never going to rise a corporate ladder without a miracle, but I get to live life on my own terms!!!

Many people feel demoralized when they invest time and expertise (often developed on their own) only to have the company expect them to train others without gratitude or compensation. This decreases motivation and can lead to burnout. The “overjustification effect” also warns that external demands (without reward) can reduce one’s intrinsic motivation.

The World Health Organization and other mental health experts point out that excessive workload without fairness or support is a major risk factor for poor mental health at work. Being required to train extra without compensation adds to that burden.

At the end of the day, training someone shouldn’t mean training away your own worth — the best workplaces are built on fairness, recognition, and respect.

I Refused to Let Coworkers Steal From Me—Maybe I Overreacted

Comments

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Patricia Hurley

3 weeks ago

When I was leaving my Cherical job because my family was moving from Sunnyvale to Garden Grove, CA, I was expected to train my Replacement. In the past, this woman actually had told me she wanted my position if I ever left. She had also told my Boss and her Boss about wanting my job.

I actually did the work of 1 1/2 people, but I knew she often saw what I did. Once I began to train her, some of what I did, she took notes and asked questions. Some of the other tasks I had, when I showed her, she said, "I'm not doing that". She said this to all of the "1/2"tasks that I had. No problem to me. I didn't care about what she did and didn't want to do. She had been jealous of my job until she found out how complicated it really was.

Theresa Kasel

2 weeks ago

I'm going story that didn't happen. HR would love to replace you with a cheaper employee. HR protects the company. Not you.

Billie Cox

2 weeks ago

Hold the bus! That is not necessarily the case. In a start up, a good HR person is necessary from the beginning. If they could find someone with the same skills maybe. But if you are doing the work of two or even three people, you are bargain. HR protects the company, you are right. You just missed the problem. He is trying to get her trained, but she will never know what he knows. The hurried pace means HR already had both of them in their sights and may have had a problem with her hiring. When he came in to ask what his rights were, they had their mole. He reported back to them and they were both moved and OP finally got a promotion. He did not have a lot of time because one or the other would have had to go. It may seem with so many right to work states where either party can leave or be fired that experienced employees can be traded for someone cheaper. Some jobs may fall there, but if you get rid of someone, a good manager knows, someone (either a new employee or even him) will have to make up the shortfall. But I am willing to bet she was young and attractive and that was the root of the problem. They had an experienced person with no discipline problems and no reason to fire or let them go (unemployment benefits cost). Hopefully that manager learns his lesson.

Mary Baker

2 weeks ago

I thought the same thing - the only thing that HR is there to do is make sure they don't get sued by an employee. I'm willing to bet that a good number of the "employee-revenge" stories on the various sites are completely fabricated.

Patrick Watkins

2 weeks ago

I was with the company I retired from for 22 years. I was asked to move to Atlanta to manage a new branch we opened. I knew my wife would never move, I turned it down, told them why, and thanked them for their confidence in me.
I was never offered a promotion again, even though our branch leadership position became available twice.
When new people were hired in sales I was given the task of training them. I received no extra pay.I knew they were some what taking advantage of me. My take was, I knew my value if that task was given to me. Sometimes personal satisfaction is the best form of payment.