I Spent Years Covering My Face With Makeup, Now I Want the Whole World to See It

People
4 months ago

For many years, Carlotta Bertotti had a secret, one she carefully concealed beneath layers of makeup. A blue-gray spot, sprawling across half of her face, served as a constant reminder of her perceived imperfection. But as Carlotta’s journey unfolds, it becomes evident that what she once thought was a flaw has blossomed into an integral part of her identity.

A battle that started at an early age.

A blue-gray spot, marked by the Nevus of Ota, is a benign skin condition. In a candid conversation, Carlotta bared her soul, recounting the arduous path she crossed towards self-acceptance. She started wearing makeup at the age of 8. For her, it wasn’t a choice; it was a question of survival. She spent two hours doing her makeup every morning, and this ritual became her armor against the world.

Carlotta’s struggle extended beyond her physical appearance. At the tender age of 12, she was diagnosed with meningioma, a benign tumor that left her face paralyzed and made her health destabilized. Her battle for survival put her into darkness, shattering her confidence and self-worth. She remembers waking up in intensive care after two weeks of medically induced coma, and her face was paralyzed. She recalled that moment as seeing a monster in the mirror.

Her teenage years and feeling unwanted

Throughout her teenage years, Carlotta was filled with insecurities, resorting to desperate measures in order to look like her peers. From elaborate makeup routines to customized contact lenses, she found rescue in brief solutions, only to be met with disappointment and anguish. She admitted trying everything to fit in. But no matter what she did, she felt like an outsider, unworthy of love and acceptance.

A failed romance that deepened her insecurities

Carlotta’s romantic relationships mirrored her deep-seated insecurities, as she found herself entangled in a toxic dynamic with a man thirteen years older than her. Their love was suffocating, marked by possessiveness and perpetual betrayals that she reluctantly endured. Desperate for validation and acceptance, she bent over backward to accommodate his every desire, convinced that it was the only path to love.

Yet, instead of affirming her worth, he incessantly chipped away at her self-esteem, criticizing even the most trivial aspects of her appearance. His hurtful words echoed in her mind, igniting a self-destructive cycle of doubt and inadequacy. She internalized his infidelity as a reflection of her own shortcomings, fulling herself with a feeling of unworthiness.

Until she finally found her voice.

Yet, amidst the darkness, a flicker of hope emerged. In 2018, Carlotta made a pivotal decision—to embrace her imperfections and share her story with the world. Since then, she has garnered a devoted following on social media, captivating audiences with her authenticity and resilience. Her journey culminated in the release of her book, “Incancellabile”, a proof of the power of self-love and acceptance.

Today, Carlotta stands tall, a beacon of inspiration for countless individuals navigating their own battles with self-image and identity. Her message to all is that there will come a day when everyone understands to be deserving of love. A moment when you realize that you gave too much importance to things that had none.

Carlotta’s story serves as a reminder that true beauty lies not in perfection, but in embracing our flaws and celebrating our uniqueness. In a world consumed by unrealistic standards and unattainable ideals, her journey is a testament to the transformative power of self-love—a journey worth embarking on, one imperfection at a time.

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