My Ex-Husband Is Furious About the Sum of Child Support He Has to Pay, «I Guess I’m Going to Have to Go to Jail Then»

Family & kids
9 months ago

A woman, 25, has just finalized a divorce with her ex-husband, 24, and the judge agreed to the requested amount of child support. The lady then took to Reddit to tell about how the story was progressing in her family. The woman was totally desperate about how the things between her and her spouse turned out after divorce and how her husband showed his true face. The man totally refused to pay, and his reasoning behind this decision would probably shake anyone’s mind.

The relationship in the family wasn’t healthy from the start.

A woman took to Reddit to tell her story, that many people found just appalling. She started her post, saying, «I, 25F, just finalized a divorce with my ex-husband, 24M, and the judge agreed to my requested amount of child support, and my ex is... not happy.»

The woman shared some background of her relationship with her husband. She said, «We were dating for a couple months when we decided to elope so that we could move across the country together and live in student housing where I was starting grad school. We barely knew each other, but it just seemed like the only choice at the time.»

Then, she found out that her life was about to change very soon. The woman revealed, «Not even a month after the 1800-mile move, I found out I was indeed pregnant. My first trimester was a hot mess, with me losing around 18lbs from being so sick. I was in my first semester of grad school and working a part-time grad assistant job to pay for school and a bit of extra income. We had our tiffs here and there, but things were mostly okay for the first few months. We were both 22, just trying to navigate living on our own so far away from family.»

Things between the spouses were getting even worse while they were preparing for parenthood.

The woman goes on with her story, saying, «It all started to go south after he gaslit and manipulated me into letting his best friend, 22M, move into our 2nd bedroom in our student housing apartment. The friend moving in was essentially the catalyst for me to start seeing who the man I married really was, which was a very emotionally immature, childish, full of unresolved trauma, lazy person. I started having my doubts on whether or not he would be able to pull the weight of being a parent, but he worked, and I depended on his income and was scared to try to leave because financially I couldn’t swing it.»

Things didn’t seem to get better even after numerous talks. The OP shared, «Fast forward several months, there was a lot of fighting, some deep conversations but no change. He couldn’t even do the basic household chores that needed to be done while I was at school and work. He lost his first job, got a second, lost that one, and was on his third job in less than 8 months.
I recognized that he had trouble keeping a job and I had my summer internship lined up that would cover all the bills, plus some, and would most likely be extended through my last year of grad school as I had previously had a discussion with my manager about this opportunity. So, I sat down with husband and asked him if he would be willing to be the stay-at-home parent while I finished grad school. We talked about the logistics and the responsibilities that this job would entail. He agreed.»

The woman’s husband didn’t seem to be a very responsible person from the start.

The woman continues, saying, «Friend moved out 2 weeks before I had the baby and things got better despite him quitting his job about 1 month prematurely so we had financial issues, but nothing crazy. My internship started 3 weeks after I gave birth. It was a remote position but required me to be in my office area for periods of time. Well... to put it nicely, homeboy couldn’t hang. Every time the baby cried he would bring her to me, say all she wanted was my boobs (I was breastfeeding and also pumping so he could give her bottles), and would bring her to me anytime he got overwhelmed and needed a break which often lasted for one hour at least at a time.»

The woman felt just desperate in such a situation. She revealed, «I knew this wouldn’t work out long term. I couldn’t keep doing everything for our child and do work, and I was worried about what things would look like when school started back up. The beginning of the semester came quick, and he was already having such a hard time.»

In the meantime, her spouse didn’t improve in any direction. The woman revealed, «When school started I would come home from class, and he would be in our apartment playing video games and our child would be next door with the neighbors. This happened several times along with other things (of course it’s never one thing), and I snapped. I couldn’t take it anymore. I was doing most of the housework chores, doing all of the taking care of child between my 2 remote jobs and classes including overnight feeding. I had a roommate who was dragging me down, so I put my foot down and told him I wanted to separate.»

This all lead to very predictable consequences for both. The OP says, «I offered for him to live in the spare bedroom until I graduated with my masters in 7 months. He was of course taken back by this, and we fought and argued, but for me there was no going back. He declined my offer to stay saying that there was no way he could deal with me for that long if we weren’t together anymore.
The night after we had this conversation he began to sleep on the neighbor’s couch while he made his plan to leave town. He would only come over once in the evening to take his dog out to the bathroom and less than a handful of times interacted with our child over the course of 2 whole weeks and some change. He formulated his plan to leave and lied to me about moving back home where we moved from and said he was staying with a friend in town.»

Now the man has shown his very true face, which his spouse just can’t stand.

The woman complained, saying, «Being a single parent of a 4.5-month-old was not on my agenda, but I knew for her stability and environment this needed to happen. In 15 months of being the sole caretaker, he has sent me $0 in support. His reasoning was that he was waiting for a court order to be implemented so that it would all be on the straight and narrow and records of transactions would be kept.»

They had an argument over custody, too. The OP said, «He was trying to fight for partial custody even though his living situation is unstable, he cannot keep a job, and he is not capable of being alone with his child for more than an hour without getting overwhelmed and needing help. We agreed to a parenting plan in mediation that states I have full custody and that he has visitation rights. He claims that he was railroaded into agreeing to this plan.»

The woman revealed, «I filed for divorce last October, and we just had our hearing to finalize the decree. He did not show up to the court hearing. It took 15 minutes and the judge agreed that the amount of child support I asked for was a reasonable amount and ordered him to pay $390/mo. This is currently 50% of my monthly childcare expense. This does not include any other type of expense that I have for her.»

The ex-husband’s reaction just made the woman mad. She wrote, «Last night on our video call I informed him of our hearing, and he immediately had excuses that he didn’t get the notification of the hearing and I told him the judge ordered this amount of child support. He got very defensive and in his usual way took zero accountability for his actions and his responsibilities and responded with „I don’t even have a job right now. I guess I’m just gonna have to go to jail then.“ And told our daughter goodbye and hung up the phone.»

The OP closed her post, explaining, «I don’t NEED this money, but it is the fact that he has fully been living his life without having to face any of the responsibilities of bringing this child into the world. Any money that he sends will go into a savings account for our daughter. I have felt so much guilt and shame for the way things ended up between the two of us, and I’d be lying if I didn’t convince myself that his gaslighting me was the truth when he has told me multiple times that I am keeping his child away from him. Now that this divorce is finalized, I can finally move on with my life knowing that my daughter is exactly where she needs to be.»

And here’s yet another woman who was unpleasantly surprised about the secret that her husband kept from her. She found a tampon in his car, and this became the start of many creepy revelations for her.

Preview photo credit working_mom32 / Reddit

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