My Stepson Ate Meat in My Vegan House, So I Banned Him

3 weeks ago

My Stepson Ate Meat in My Vegan House, So I Banned Him

When I tell people about it, I usually get two very different reactions. Some say I am being controlling, others say I am standing up for my values. Honestly, I just want to put this out there and see if I am the one in the wrong.

Hi, dear reader!

I’m Mary (name changed for privacy). I am strictly vegan, and I do not allow meat in my house. This is not just a diet for me, it is a lifestyle and something I care deeply about. I do not buy meat, I do not cook it, and I definitely do not want it in my kitchen.

My husband has known this since we got together, and he has respected it by only eating vegan food at home.

Cathy F

week ago

You're a manipulative jerk

The issue started when my stepson, who is 17, moved in with us temporarily. At his mom’s place, he eats whatever he wants, mostly fast food and a lot of meat. When he came here, he agreed to follow my rules and not bring meat inside the house; he could eat whatever he wanted outside.

I thought things were fine at first, but he quickly started complaining about the lack of “real food” and made comments like, “It’s just food, why do you care so much?”

Then one night, everything blew up. I woke up to an awful smell and went downstairs to find him cooking meat in my kitchen. He had a pan out and was frying something that made the whole house smell.

I lost it and told him to leave right then and there and that he was banned from my home. I thought that was the end of it, but I was so wrong.

Later, I heard a crash in the kitchen. When I went to check, I froze. My fridge was full of meat, every shelf stacked with steaks, chicken wings, and sausages. All of my vegan food—my tofu, veggies, plant-based milk—was gone. On the fridge was a note in his handwriting: “If you can’t respect my choices, do not expect me to respect you or yours.”

I felt sick. This was not just disrespect; it was like he was declaring war on me in my own home. My husband said I should not have snapped at him earlier, and that his son was only acting out because he feels restricted. But to me, this went way too far. Replacing all of my food and leaving that note felt like a calculated attack.

Now I am stuck. I do not want my stepson to feel unwelcome, but I also feel like he crossed a major line. If he cannot respect the one rule in my house, what am I supposed to do? Am I wrong for refusing to let my stepson eat meat in my house, or was I right to put my foot down?

Sometimes you just can’t let things slide, especially when someone thinks they can walk all over you. Read next: 12 Petty Revenges So Satisfying, They Deserve a Medal

Comments

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Alexis Duckett

3 weeks ago

My daughter and her family are vegetarian. I am not and alot of family and friends of theirs are not either. When I visit her, and I'm almost 3,000 miles away, I do my own food shopping. I bought a specific pan for meat products only that I left there for her other guests. When she has parties, she offers meat options. It is very rude to force your lifestyle.on someone else. If you expect him to respect your lifestyle, you should respect his. My daughter has been vegetarian since she was 16, living in my house. I respected her decision and bought her vegetarian food and the rest of us ate meat. You are so wrong for mistreating a 17 year old minor. Not fulfilling basic needs to a minor is considered abuse and forcing your lifestyle on him is also abuse. Let the kid make some bacon, get separate cooking items for him to use. Get your underwear out of your ass and treat him AND your husband as individuals that can make their own decision. IMO you suck for doing this and are being irrational. And I hope your husband helped him with restocking the fridge and buying the items. Serves you right for being an ass and kicking out a minor, also reportable to authorities.

Kimberly Regner

week ago

You knew your stepson is a meat lover before he moved in. If you were going to be such a hot head over the issue than why let him move in? It wouldn't have killed you to allow him to have his meat. The problem with you vegans is that you shove your lifestyle down other people's throats making the more tolerant ones look bad.

Lisa Martin

week ago

If my spouse banned my child from my home over food, that would be a hill hill would die on.

Lady

week ago

Wow....um...talk about controlling. You definitely need a reality check. This sounds like preference, not food allergies. Ever hear of compromise? I have friends that range from vegetarian, vegan to regular meat eaters. We can all have dinner parties, each brings a dish. My vegan friends do NOT force this on thier children, as they want them to choose thier own eating style.
Give the kid a break, he is 17, living with you temporarily. Have a freaking heart. Maybe learn something, like stop being a spoiled brat??

Weak Knees

week ago

The stinker for me was that you banned your stepson from the house. He did make a serious attempt, but your diet wasn't working for him. Yes, he should have talked with you first, but he did make sure you were asleep before he began cooking so you wouldn't have to watch him cook and eat meat.
You're going to have to lose that bee in your bonnet and realize your stepson doesn't bend the knee to your food choices. Separate pans and knives is a start, and maybe meat two or three times a week.