I Absolutely Refuse to Walk My Daughter Down the Aisle After What She Did to Her Mom

A heartbroken father poured his soul out on Reddit, seeking brutal honesty. He adores his daughter and should be thrilled she’s marrying the love of her life. But instead, he’s refusing to walk her down the aisle—after a shocking revelation shattered everything he believed about his family.

A desperate father turned to Reddit to share the story of his serious conflict with his daughter.

The OP began his story, saying, "So, this has been an ongoing issue in my family for a while, but now that the wedding is coming up, everything has come to a head.

I (50M) have a daughter, “Emma” (26F), who I’ve always had a very close relationship with. I’ve been married to my wife (Emma’s mom), “Laura” (49F), for 30 years now. We’re a solid family—or at least I thought we were."

The man then shared some backstory, "A couple of years ago, Emma met her now-fiancé, “Tom” (28M). Things moved fast between them, and she was head over heels for him. We were happy for her at first, but something changed about a year into their relationship.

Emma became distant from us, especially her mom. Laura and Emma used to be really close, but all of a sudden, Emma started snapping at her for little things, avoiding family dinners, and not sharing anything about her life. Then we found out why."

Right before the wedding, Emma suddenly became cold and aggressive to her mom.

The OP wrote, “About a year and a half ago, I overheard Emma and Tom having a conversation when they didn’t know I was around. She was saying horrible things about her mom—stuff that really broke my heart.

Emma was telling Tom that she couldn’t stand how ‘overbearing’ her mom was, that Laura always tried to ‘control’ her, and that she felt like Laura was jealous of her life and success. She even said she ‘resents’ her mom for putting so much pressure on her when she was younger.

I was floored. Laura has always supported Emma in everything she did, from helping her through college to emotionally supporting her during rough patches. I never saw any of this coming. But instead of addressing it right then, I wanted to wait and talk to Emma calmly later.”

The frustrated dad made a very tough decision about his daughter’s wedding.

The man wrote, “When I finally brought it up with her, she completely shut down and got defensive. She claimed I was ‘taking her mom’s side’ and that I didn’t understand what it was like to grow up with someone who was ‘always in your business.’ She said some really hurtful things and ended up storming out.

After that, she basically cut off her mom entirely, except for the absolute bare minimum communication for holidays or family events. Laura’s heartbroken. I’m angry. It’s been a mess.

Fast-forward to now, Emma’s getting married. She called me last week to ask if I would walk her down the aisle. But here’s the thing: I don’t feel right doing it when she’s treating her mother like this. Laura’s not even invited to the wedding—Emma said it would ‘make things too uncomfortable’ if her mom were there.

I told Emma that I can’t walk her down the aisle if she’s excluding her mom, who’s done nothing but love and support her all her life. I said that until she makes things right with her mom, I won’t be part of the wedding.”

Now, the OP is suddenly a villain. Just because he stood up for his wife.

The OP shared, “Emma was furious. She accused me of ‘choosing mom over her,’ said I was ‘ruining her big day,’ and claimed I was punishing her for being honest about her feelings.

She’s now threatening to go no-contact with both of us, and I’m torn up inside. I love my daughter, but I can’t stand by and watch her treat her mother like this.

Am I a bad father for refusing to walk her down the aisle?”

People of Reddit delivered their strong and honestly emotional opinions.

• One user immediately asked, “Did you ever find out what your daughter meant when she said her mom always tried to control her? I think that’s the key to you understanding her reaction.”
• Another one added, “I think the fact that he did not try to find out why she was feeling the way she was feeling is the actual key to understanding her reaction.”
• One person shared their life experience, “My mom was completely different when my dad wasn’t around. It was such a weird relationship. One day, she would use me as her shoulder to cry on, and the next, I was the punching bag — literally and figuratively.
  As I got older, the verbal offense was ramped up. Any outing I had without my siblings (I’m the oldest) would mean text messages from her, calling me nasty names. When I decided to leave (I left pretty suddenly), my dad was shocked.
  I told him what was happening, and all I got was, ‘Well, she’s the mom life gave you, and you’re the daughter life gave her, and we have to stick together.’ Decided it was best to keep my distance from both from then on.”

• One more user wrote, “I think you need to find out what happened between your daughter and her mum a year and a half ago. This didn’t come out of nowhere.”
• Another person supposed, “She met Tom’s mom. And is comparing them now.”
• One more user suggested, “If mom has been like that for 24.5 years, it may not have taken something OP would see as ‘big’ to cause the break. It may have just been that the totality of small and medium things finally hit daughter’s tipping point. And OP needs to understand that.
  Some things are forgivable once or twice or even a dozen times. But if it’s tens or hundreds of times a year over 24 years, that’s a problem.”

When love gives you a second chance, it also hands you someone else’s past. These stories cut deep, about stepparents who tried, kids who resisted, and families that never quite fit the way everyone hoped they would.