I Want to Call Off My Wedding Because My Husband Is Embarrassed About My Culture

There’re so many reasons why a husband and wife might have a major argument and the relationship may come to a dead end. Our today’s heroine is a woman, who experienced one of such incidents in her own relationship. The woman came to Reddit to ask people for a piece of advice, and she’s seriously considering to call off her wedding, because she doesn’t feel understood and respected enough.

The woman needed help and advice badly and turned to Reddit with her problem.

A woman began her post, saying, «Hi! I really need some advice (I might omit some things just because a lot of my friends are here). I’m 26 years old and am getting married to my husband, 28. I’m from a small village, and moved to the US 5 years ago.»

The woman explained why she mentioned her origin, saying, «That’s important because in such a short amount of time, I’m not assimilated to the US culture and am still very involved in mine. When I met my husband, a few weeks into us dating he told me he was going to marry me (as a joke) but I told him how marriage works in my culture, and he praised how beautiful it was.»

The future spouses have made an agreement about their wedding.

The woman goes on, saying, «Fast forward now. We agreed on doing 2 weddings, one of my culture and the other an American wedding. In my village when you get married, both spouses get a gold bangle sort of thing, it’s equivalent to a wedding ring.»

She detailed the tradition, and wrote, «There is a ceremony and party for that as well. It’s molded on your wrist and can’t come off unless you use like a saw or something like that. During my traditional wedding, I received a gift of these fruits I ate back home and are truly my favorite but haven’t been able to find in the US.»

The couple seemed to have at least some understanding at this point, and the woman said, «My hus jokes about he was not looking forward to smelling that every day. Which is fine because I hate the smell of sausage, but it’s something he loves.»

But the things got tense instantly.

The woman says, «I stayed back home for a week because I had missed it and my husband came home early to prepare for the American wedding. I came home Monday but didn’t see my husband since he had work and by the time he finished I was sleeping. We had dinner last night and I saw that he didn’t have his bangle and he told me he thought it was just for the party.»

It turned out that her husband-to-be didn’t think her traditions were important. The OP said, «I explained to him again how important it is to me. And he said that I couldn’t seriously expect him to wear it all the time. I asked him why not, and he told me it made him look unprofessional. I got upset with him and left.»

And the argument between the couple seemed only to be growing. The woman explained, «He ended up calling me to explain how it holds no cultural significance to him, so I told him. I rebutted asking him if he was fine with me not wearing a wedding ring as it holds no cultural significance to me, he got a bit upset and gave me a lecture on how if we were in my country he’d wear it.»

People of Reddit supported the woman and expressed their opinions on the conflict.

The woman wrote, «I feel so turned off and uninterested in this relationship that I am thinking of calling off the wedding.»

The users of Reddit were quick to react to her situation. One user wrote, «He does sound uninterested and judgmental about your culture. If you plan on kids, you should see how he reacts if you bring up teaching them your language or customs. Kids deserve a parent who doesn’t deny half of their identity and culture. And you deserve a partner who doesn’t deny you yours.»

Another person mentioned, «I was married at 60, and we have matching rings. I don’t wear jewelry much, so it pretty much sat on my vanity unless we were going out. One day, I forgot when we were out, and when I said it was going to take a little getting used to (again, at 60), his reply was simply, „I have never taken it off since our ceremony.“ That hit me in the feels, and now it is on 24/7/365.»

And the other person said, «That should’ve been answer enough. Unless he’s got a below average intelligence, he also likely knew exactly what it meant in your culture. Lucky for you, you’re not legally married here yet, and you just got gifted something most people don’t until it’s too late.»

And here’s yet another dramatic wedding story from a woman, whose husband deeply humiliated her on their wedding day, but got his karma instantly.