My Cousin Asked to Be Our Wedding Photographer, Now He Demands an Exorbitant Payment

You’d think family bonds are built on love, trust, and support. Throw in a special occasion like a wedding, and suddenly, those ties can get tangled. It’s often said that family will always have your back.

But what happens when a heartfelt gesture comes with a surprise price tag? This story is a little reminder that even the closest connections can get complicated when expectations clash with reality.

My cousin initially offered to take our wedding photos as “a gift.”

Got married recently. My cousin is a professional wedding photographer and said, “As my gift to you two, I would be happy to take the photos at your wedding.” We told him we didn’t want him to feel obligated to do that or have him feel burdened with work during this celebratory weekend. He said he was happy to do it.

We repeatedly expressed how grateful we were and made sure to tag his business in all our posts. We figured that was that. Now it’s a few months later, and he’s received our thank you note for attending and photographing. He called to say that the gift wasn’t the photos, it was him taking the time to put us on his busy wedding photography schedule, but we were still expected to pay. He wants us to pay $3,000.

Not to sound ungrateful, but it was only him with a camera, no extra equipment or staff members. For less than that price, we could have gone with our original choice of wedding photographer, who’d offered more people present at the wedding and a more advanced photography set-up.

We told him because he’d said it was “his gift to us” we did not set aside a large photo budget, and now don’t have $3,000 to give him.

He’s basically said we’re greedy and don’t respect his work and this and that. I feel bad about the misunderstanding, but I think it was an honest mistake on our parts and that he bears some responsibility for the expectation being unclear.

My parents think I should just drop it and pay him in installments to keep the peace. They seem to believe that I’m making this more than it needs to be.

What do Redditors have to say about this?

• He robbed you of your chance to budget and choose a better option. If you have the photos you need, don’t pay him. © Narciiii / Reddit
• There’s no way he would have done the whole wedding, and delivered photos, without mentioning a price beforehand, unless it was presented as a gift. He either was planning this all along or is in sudden need of cash. © Tikithing / Reddit
• No professional photographer releases the photos without payment. He’s grifting you. And this is a recent decision. Block him, and update all your posts saying to never use cousin’s services as he is extremely unprofessional. © Wereallgonna***man / Reddit
• It wasn’t an “honest mistake on your part.” He literally said it was a gift and you signed NOTHING. If this was supposed to be a business transaction the entire time, as a professional photographer, he would have had you sign a contract.
  I have NEVER heard of any business involved in weddings, including florists, caterers, etc, where there wasn’t a contract and/or some type of payment upfront. If your parents feel that strongly, they can give him $3000. It is completely unreasonable that they (and he) think you should give him anything. Show your parents the responses to this. © legally***123 / Reddit

It’s no secret that weddings often become a breeding ground for misunderstandings and family fights. What happens when one person is banned while their partner is still invited?