In our 55 years together having the baby was the hardest test. Our lives were forced to diverge. I worked. At the weekend I had to catch up on farmwork that she used to share with me. She wanted a break from looking after the baby 24/7. Her friends and experiences were with other young mums. There wasn't a lot of room for me in that. What is more is that it was so sudden. No time to adjust. One moment we were lovers and the best of friends and then the baby was born and a wedge was placed between us. Nor was any help offered to the new dad. And the lack of sleep only compounded all the issues. It was only when the children grew to be a few years old that we were able to enjoy having them.
The Happiest and the Hardest Years of Marriage Are Finally Identified

Not all couples realize that effort from both partners is needed in family life. In accordance with this data, around 40.7% of European marriages end in divorce in less than 10 years. A study by Slater and Gordon Lawyers identified which year of marriage is the happiest and which is the hardest.
We at Bright Side would like to highlight the factors that can become reasons for divorce.
3 years
There is an opinion that love lives for only 3 years. Then a couple breaks up or their relationship becomes less ideal than before. In reality, after 3 years in a relationship, people are more inclined to accept their partner’s weaknesses and, thus, feel more comfortable.
It is also common that in the third year of family life a couple decides to have a baby. Consequently, their relationship becomes stronger. It is the third year of marriage that is believed to be the happiest.
5 years
The first real problems can start in the fifth year of family life. During this period of time, the children are still small and demand a lot of attention. This is very hard to combine with work, housekeeping, and other everyday problems.
It is after 5 years together that couples start thinking about divorce and turn to lawyers. This year is believed to be the hardest.
7 years
If a couple stays together after 5 years of marriage, then another barrier is waiting for them to overcome. It is the seventh year of family life, which specialists call “the 7-year itch.” By this time, family life becomes routine. There might also be financial issues, childcare issues, and quarrels about sharing household responsibilities.
This is a very complicated period. If the spouses manage to get through it hand in hand, then a strong and happy marriage will be ahead of them.
And here are some factors which are worth avoiding if you want to keep the marriage strong:
- Inflated expectations. It was discovered that couples file for divorce more often in spring and in fall. Before that, they try to give their marriage a second chance. If it doesn’t work out, then a divorce cannot be avoided.
- Silencing problems. Specialists conducted an experiment among young couples which proved that even discussions about movies can reduce the risk of divorce by half. So talking properly about your family difficulties can really save your marriage.
- The lack of skills to build relationships. Having more siblings means less chance of divorce as an adult. Scientists claim that people who grew up in big families are more skilled at building relationships. In the future, this skill can help them save their marriage.
- The lack of desire to listen. If one of the partners does not want to listen during a fight, then the risk of divorce is much higher.
- Life in social networks. Active users of social networking who are in a romantic relationship may find that Twitter-related conflicts cause relationship problems that can become serious enough to result in a divorce.
- Financial arguments. Couples who often argue about money are more inclined to divorce, even if the income of both partners is high.
- Low education level. Research defined that people with a higher education have lower chances of divorce, regardless of the gender or country of living.
Avoid making these mistakes and you will live a long and happy life together.
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