My Sister Excluded Me From Her Wedding Because She Wants to Invite My Ex-Boyfriend

Making a wedding guest list can seem exciting, but it can also cause tension. Couples may have different priorities, families might have their own expectations, and considering guests’ budgets and preferences can lead to disagreements. Despite these challenges, finding a balance is key to ensuring everyone enjoys the special day. This woman’s story is unique: she wasn’t invited to her sister’s wedding, but her ex was.

"My sister, "Emily", is getting married soon. We've always been close, but things changed after my breakup with Chris, my ex of 5 years. We split up three months ago because he pursued a job overseas, and I didn't want to move.

Emily and Chris have always gotten along, but I never thought she'd side with him over me. Yesterday, she called and casually mentioned that she invited Chris to the wedding — as a groomsman. Worse, she told me I was not invited due to the 'limited guest list,' fearing my presence with Chris would cause drama."

"I was planning to pay for half of Emily's wedding as my gift since we come from a modest background. Feeling hurt and betrayed, I told her if she thinks uninviting me for my ex is okay, she should manage without my financial support. Emily blew up, calling me petty and selfish, accusing me of ruining her day and manipulating her.

Now, our family is divided — some say I'm justified, others say I'm being too harsh and letting my breakup affect her happiness. Am I a bad guy here?"

Here is what people had to say about this situation: some blamed her, while others felt sorry for her.

• "I'm sure Chris and any other family members who have an issue with you not paying for a wedding you aren't welcome at will have no problem filling the financial gap." Anxious-Routine-5526 / Reddit
• "Family, friends, and associates, no matter what they say, the only person you can really trust is yourself as life is a learning curve. And you need to learn that those who do you wrong, do not deserve your time or effort to appease them, just forget them as life is too short to have toxic people around you." Unknown user / Reddit
• "Your sister chose your ex over you! Rude, well I guess Chris can pay for half the wedding then! Please do not feel guilty for rescinding your offer… How can anyone in their right mind, especially your sister, expect you to pay half after she has disrespected you in such a big way?" Trick_Parsley_3077 / Reddit

• “Let’s be clear. This has nothing to do with your EX. Your sister is treating you horribly and acting ridiculously entitled. She expects you to foot the bill for a big family event she will not allow you to attend. The reason is immaterial. Anyone who thinks she is not acting like an AH is just willfully ignorant.” KindlyCelebration223 / Reddit
• “You committed your sister to find half her special day. But at that time you were a part of that day, and likely in the wedding party. She has every right to rescind your invitation, as it is her wedding. But she cannot expect you to pay for an event you are no longer actively participating in. It is not emotional manipulation. It is not selfish.
  Why should she benefit after punishing you for not wanting to move overseas? Basically, she wants to punish you for breaking ‘Chris’s’ heart, and you do not have to reward her for doing it. I am curious, when you broke up with ‘Chris’ was it amicable or acrimonious? You have the right not to want to move. Did he blame you for his opportunity?” jmg4craigslists / Reddit
• “And any family members claiming the author is being too harsh... Well, they can open up their wallets and fund the wedding. The author has zero obligation to do so. I hope the author takes the money that would have gone towards the wedding and takes a nice drama-free vacation for herself. Sis is bonkers to expect the author to pay for an event that they are no longer invited to.” Scorp128 / Reddit

Recently, a woman shared her feelings online about her brother’s child-free wedding, which excluded her son. She felt confused, hurt, and left out. Read more about it here.