How Modern Animals Would Look As Dinosaurs
You wake up with your head feeling heavy. Ummm... 1, where’s your comfy bed? And 2, why were you just sleeping on the wet and dirty ground in the middle of nowhere. Wait, what’s all this stuff around you? Are you in... the Jungle?
There’s a backpack nearby with essentials like water, cookies, candy bars, and a jacket. It’s yours for sure — but, still, hello! How on earth did you get here. Wait, jacket? It’s insanely hot, you definitely won’t be needing that. Seriously, what is this place? Giant leafy plants, thick rainforest trees... Huh, kinda looks like Jurassic...
You jump in fear, look around, and run under one of those shady plants. Okay, not a great choice and definitely not the best time to recall that you’re terrible at hide-and-seek — there’s a huge weird-looking animal coming out of the bushes, staring at you. “Dinosaur!”
You scream, you shiver, you cover your eyes. Not exactly how you were expecting your morning to go. Wait a minute. Dinosaurs don’t bark. You open your eyes. That thing definitely charged at you, but now it’s just jumping around, wagging its long tail, barking, and sticking its tongue out. And it looks so familiar...
“It’s a dog?” You almost cry out in relief. That thing’s weird. Dog....osaurus — What else could it be? Big, grey, and hairy, but insanely similar to a T-Rex. Its front legs are actually short little arms, and its long muzzle with sharp teeth is all over you. While Dogosaurus is covering you with dino-slobber, another hairy thing comes out of the bushes. White and fluffy, short front legs, long dark gray tail... ridiculously big ears... it’s a Dinorabbit.
The 2 animals start chasing each other and goofing around. Erm... Is this for real? Dogosaurus gets bored and comes running up to you, starts rubbing its head on your arm. You pet it, while also wondering what to do next. What happens if this thing gets annoyed or... Hungry?
“I’m gonna call it Max.” You grab a random stick and throw it as far as possible. Well, at least that’s over. The Dino-dog’s gone and questions start overloading your brain. What is that thing doing in the jungle? What else lives here? Are they all going to be that friendly?
It doesn’t take long to find out — a horrifying sound fills your ears, you turn slowly this time... Another surprise — just a few feet away, another huge beast is staring at you. Its eyes are the scariest part — wide open and pointed directly at you. You hold your breath...it could all be over in an instant...but after a moment you let out a sigh of relief.
It’s only a zebra! Well... Zebrasaurus. Bizarre... black and white stripes over a muscly body, and wow, that head is long. Its tail looks like it means business, and its back is covered with bony plates. Zebrasaurus takes a step forward... Zebras, they just eat grass and stuff right? Hope this thing does too... let’s see... 3 options: Run, lie still or pet the giant Zebrasaurus.
Wham! A way more hairy beast jumps out of the bushes and the race is on. Was that a chuckle? A laugh...wait was that a Hyena! Hyenasaurus? Hyenas have one of the strongest jaws and necks around, that plus dinosaur... pretty serious combination.
1 option: Run. That zebra seems to know what’s up. You start running, fighting off huge leafy plants and tripping over the roots of tall jungle trees. You jump, duck, dodge...and finally get out of the jungle... a beach, perfect. Now you’ve got time to think about what you just saw — what’s the plan now? Ocean, palms, sun, and finally, some fresh sea air. You take a deep breath and close your eyes.
Quiet as a feather, giant paws softly crushing the grass, the whoosh of an elegant tail. Huge, grayish, and strong, with insanely long claws hidden in her big, soft paws. And the head, gross. You do a double take. Still gross! It looks like a bare skull with sharp teeth and warm yellow eyes. This animal’s not interested in you at all. It crouches down, looks ready to pounce.
Then the Catosaurus lazily purrs and starts licking its fur. At least it didn’t think you looked like a mouse, a stick, a ball, a cardboard box...cats like the weirdest things. No time! The beach is suddenly full of gigantic red crabs! There’re hundreds of them, lying around, resting their long, sharp claws. Since when do crabs have 10 eyes and 4 huge claws? Craboseraptors do! You cover your mouth, but the scream comes out anyways. You run back into the jungle, not the best idea...
This time you run and never look back. Your only goal is not to hear those raspy clicking Craboseraptor claws anymore. Something’s different though, the jungle’s changed; the jungle looks like it’s morphing... no more vines, huge weird leaves... The air’s cooler, the paths are a bit wider...apparently you’re in a forest now? You come across a large open field, with a big dreamy lake in the middle. Perfect selfie location, apart from all those Dino-things, and trees that can shape-shift, apparently.
A piercing scream flies across the lake. Pretty easy to recognize this graceful animal, even if the color’s a bit off — It’s a gray Swanodactyl, ‘S’-shaped neck and everything. But this swan’s had a few upgrades installed. Razor sharp beak, big strong claws, and eyes that look like they can spot a tasty meal from miles away. Well, you’re not a fish, so you’ll probably be alright.
Apart from that, the lake is gorgeous, water Lilies everywhere, the size of tables. Humungous lilies, humungous... Ribbit, ribbit! Great. Frogosaurus, that’s a thing now. A huge one jumps out of the water and lands like a ninja on a lily. It looks like a huge rock, covered with dark gray bumpy skin. There’s no prince charming hiding in that thing, no way. Phew, you hide behind a giant bush. That frog has an epic sized tongue, nasty.
Not even that crazy tongue could save it from what was coming up behind it — the floating head of a giant crocodilo-saurus...raptor-rex something... It looks the same as a regular crocodile, only much bigger! Like it needed any help to make it scarier. Frogosaurus jumps back into the water and starts to swim away with its huge back legs. The chase is on, and pretty soon they both disappear under the surface... sure, hope that guy made it. You almost feel sorry for the poor frog, but there’s no time to think.
The ground starts to shake. That’s never good. A couple of trees near you crash to the ground. It looks like an upside down boat! What is that thing? Oh, turtle-saurus. That guy needs to lay off the coffee and protein barzzzzzzzzzzzz. Um? What’s that buzzing? It’s getting louder and louder. 2 things. 1, that sounds like a bee. 2, please let it just be normal size.
But instead of a tiny flying insect, a human-sized B-Rex lands on the giant turtle’s shell. It got legs like a powerlifter, and its antennas look sharp! If it’s only one, that’s ok. Hopefully. Out of nowhere, you hear a horrifying shriek. Oh, make it please stop already! A gigantic shadow covers the ground, and you look up. Some sort of Bird-like dinosaur! These things actually have an official name, but you have no idea what it is. You only see its reddish-blue feathers, a sharp beak full of sharper teeth, and... What are those things coming out of its wings?
The bird sees the B-Rex, and swoops down to grab itself a midday snack, but B-Rex hides under the turtle’s shell. Good thinking! Something tells me I wouldn’t be that fast, or clever, if that happened to me. I’d probably just... And then it happens.
Its dark creepy eyes notice you from a distance. You take a small step back, so far none of the other animals have noticed you. Crack! A twig snaps under your shoe, and suddenly dozens of eyes latch on to you, curious, angry, hungry eyes. Back to option 1: run. You’re going as fast as you can, but everything seems hopeless. You come to a huge cliff with a river way down at the bottom. You close your eyes and jump. Boom! Your whole body shakes. You open your eyes. You’re awake! It was all just a bad dream, right? Right?