I Admitted to My Wife That I Wish Our Kids Were Never Born

Becoming a parent comes with more uncertainty than many other choices in life. However, it can also bring immense happiness. Research indicates that approximately 17-18% of parents feel sorry about choosing to have children. Recently, a reader of Bright Side, who is part of this group, faced a tough situation when he told his wife that he wished he hadn’t become a parent.

Bright Side got a letter from Roger, who really needs our assistance. We hope our guidance can support him and his wife during this challenging time.

Hi Roger! Thanks for reaching out.
We’re genuinely sorry to hear that you and your wife are struggling in your relationship. However, we’re pleased that you reached out to us for advice. Our team of knowledgeable individuals is here to provide you with the assistance you’re looking for to the best of our abilities.

• It’s a positive step that you shared your feelings with your wife. Keeping problems to yourself can cause anxiety and excessive worrying. Talking about your feelings can provide relief and help resolve the issues with your wife.
  Explain the reasons behind your feelings and reassure her that you still love your children. Highlight some of the happy moments you’ve shared as a family to show that you don’t solely focus on the negatives in this situation.

• You mentioned that you strongly dislike your job, and the positive thing is you have options. You can look for a new job, work on enhancing your skills, or even consider a different career path. It’s never too late to make a change.
  
  We understand you might be worried about taking risks because your family relies on you. However, your role as a father and husband is not just about financial support; it also involves your happiness and mental well-being. Talk with your wife and let her know you’re unhappy with your current job. Maybe she can help you discover talents or interests you haven’t explored.

• Suggest to your wife that you both have a special date night, just the two of you, at least twice a month. This can help bring back the romantic spark in your relationship and remind you both of the reasons you chose to embark on this journey together. Date nights allow you to have meaningful conversations, which can be challenging, or even impossible, to do at home with the kids constantly around.

• Find a way to carve out some time just for yourself. Reconnect with the activities you used to enjoy before having kids, whether it’s spending time with friends, riding a bike, or watching TV. Remember that your well-being is important, too, and allow yourself to do these things without feeling guilty. Have an open conversation with your wife and tell her you need a day alone to recharge your batteries. We hope she understands and supports your need for personal space.

Roger, we hope these suggestions and guidance can assist you in addressing your situation. Perhaps this conflict can begin a journey to restore your relationship to its former state.

We recognize that being a parent comes with significant responsibilities, and we all encounter difficulties and moments when we need a break. In this case, the mother has confessed that instead of making breakfast for her kids, she chooses to sleep and faces criticism for this choice.