My MIL Tried to Copy My Style— But I Outsmarted Her With One Move

Having someone copy your style can seem flattering, but for others, it can get a bit annoying, especially if that copycat is your MIL. In this story, this woman’s MIL seems to love her style so much so that she can’t help but copy every bit of it. But this woman isn’t staying quiet.

My MIL is such a copycat.

She writes, “My MIL copies everything I do. At first, it was little things—my lipstick, my decor, even my favorite snacks. When I brought it up, my husband said I was overreacting. So I came up with a plan. For my birthday, I dyed my hair bright blue—something I’d always wanted to do. Then, my MIL showed up, as expected, with the same blue hair and the exact same dress my husband had gifted me.”

My husband was finally convinced.

She continues, “He was speechless. That’s when he finally admitted, ‘Okay... maybe you’re not overreacting.’ A few days later, I told her I was thinking of going pink next and even showed her a fake inspo pic. Sure enough, she showed up with hot pink hair—looking proud.

What she didn’t know was that I had already gone back to my natural color. Now she’s upset that we don’t match, told my husband I tricked her, and says I owe her an apology. He thinks I made fun of his mom and should say sorry. Maybe I went too far. What do you think I should do?”

It’s okay to be mad.

Thank you for sharing your story with us. It seems that your MIL is going too far when copying your style. While having the same shirt or shoes is fine, copying the exact same hair color and dress, especially one bought by your husband, is a bit odd. Your frustration is understandable.

It may be confusing to know whether your approach was too much or not.

Honestly, your plan wasn’t malicious, it was more of a lighthearted way to highlight a pattern your husband wasn’t taking seriously. You didn’t force your MIL to dye her hair, she made that choice herself. That said, it’s understandable why she feels tricked, even if that wasn’t your intention. The bigger issue here isn’t just the hair, it’s the ongoing copying, which clearly bothers you.

Talk to your husband.

Now that your husband sees the pattern, it’s a good time to have a calm conversation with him about how this behavior affects you. Instead of framing it as “your mom is annoying,” focus on how it makes you feel, like your individuality isn’t being respected. Ask for his support in setting gentle boundaries with her.

Approach your MIL.

Honestly, your plan wasn’t malicious, it was more of a lighthearted way to highlight a pattern your husband wasn’t taking seriously. You didn’t force your MIL to dye her hair, she made that choice herself. That said, it’s understandable why she feels tricked, even if that wasn’t your intention. The bigger issue here isn’t just the hair, it’s the ongoing copying, which clearly bothers you.

You’re not wrong for wanting your own identity, and your MIL may not even realize how her actions come across. A little communication (and maybe some light boundaries) could go a long way. Some MILs don’t understand boundaries. Just look at this story of a woman refusing to even see her MIL again.